Man charged with DUI while riding a motorized bar stool

Story is from Ohio. Police were called because he had, yes, crashed his bar stool.

Hat Tip: Many thanks, Keith G in PV!

"I'm a peaceful person. I wish that I had killed him."

You really need to see the photo that comes with this story, which is about a wheelchair-using grandma who shoots (but only injures) an alleged mugger. She's now being sued for millions to pay for his injuries.

Hat Tip: Many thanks, Goshel!

Paging Dr. Spock ...

In Australia, two daycare workers are facing criminal charges for threatening to cut off a 4-year-old boy's penis because he, well, kept whipping it out. The story doesn't say if this strategy actually worked.

Hat Tip: Many thanks, Simone!

Man shot, critically injured outside Olathe bar

From Bob Cronkleton: Police are investigating an early morning shooting that critically injured a man outside an Olathe bar. The shooting occurred about 1:30 a.m. in the parking lot of the Jobsite Bar & Grill in the 1300 block of East Park Street.

Details of what lead up to the shooting were not immediately available this morning. No suspect information was available from police. Anyone with information about the shooting is asked to call the TIPS Hotline at 816-474-TIPS (474-8477).

"She was kinda grinding -- like, putting her butt against you"

Nobody's been charged, so technically not a crime story -- but I thought you'd want to know about a substitute teacher who allegedly got drunk at work and ordered her middle-school students to dance with her in class. And yes, they were able to lay hands on a video camera. Snip:

At one point, witnesses say Nelson partially exposed her butt while dancing with a 13-year-old boy.

"We told her, 'Miss Nelson, please pull up your pants', and she did, but then they fell down again and she held them there," the 8^th grader said, also noting her teacher did not appear to have on underwear.

"She was kinda grinding, like, putting her butt against you," the student said.

Miss Nelson reportedly was later found passed out near a community pool, the story says.

Hat Tip: Many thanks, Derek!

Utah man opens fire on McDonald's drive-through ...

... because they were still serving breakfast, and he wanted something off the lunch menu. I'm not saying this is OK, but I understand.

Should Adam Herrman's adoptive parents be charged?

And if so, what charges should they face? The Butler County sheriff isn't saying what counts exactly, but he does think they have a strong enough case for prosecutors to go after Herrman's adoptive parents. The case is now in the DA's hands.

For those arriving late, Herrman is a Kansas boy who disappeared 10 years ago in Towanda, Kan. -- but was only REPORTED missing a few months ago. Authorities have searched the trailer park where he used to live and the surrounding area, but have found no physical evidence. His relatives, though, say they believe his adoptive parents are responsible.

Michigan man suffers serious crotch burn, is ticketed by police

He'd been hosting a party where underage people had been drinking alcohol, police alleged. He apparently fell asleep, which allowed one of his guests to put a candle under the man's crotch. Snip:

“Quick thought it would be funny to take the candle and burn Soring,” Wilson said. “The candle lit his pants on fire and he woke up and put the fire out.”

Firestarter is looking at an assault charge. His host was ticketed for the alcohol-supplying.

Is one year of wrongful incarceration worth $25K? $80K?

The AP has a piece here about Texas and how it treats prisoners who were wrongly convicted. Right now, they get about $25K for every year of incarceration, but they say they go through the money very quickly because they can't get jobs. (Partly because they don't have job skills or socialization, partly because of their past records.) A group of them have got a lawyer, and they're pushing the legislature to up the payment to $80K per year.

Report: Internet ripoffs jumped 33 percent last year

U.S. victims lost a total of $265 million, the National Internet Crime Center says. The bulk of the losses were from financial transactions where someone promised to ship a product, but never did. (Or failed to provide payment.) And it sounds like a lot of people lost money on Nigerian princesses and the Canadian lottery, which doesn't seem like a crime so much as natural selection.

Denver deputy admits to Macing bunny rabbit

Some people might think this will hurt his reputation, but I believe it's an upgrade. If you're willing to Mace a bunny rabbit, it's clear you have no moral barricades against doing anything.

Mug shot of the day

In case you missed this link on the OT, this is what someone who would threaten to burn down a house over a dog dispute looks like.

| Sara Shepherd

Hat tip: Thanks to You're a Mean Drunk R2D2!

Teen prostitute paid in chicken nuggets

A 27-year-old man and his 16-year-old girlfriend used money the girl (also 16) earned to pay the $1,050 weekly rent on their Brisbane apartment. Her wages? An occasional box of chicken nuggets.

Judge to pimp: "Your conduct can properly be described as that of a sleaze merchant."

| Sara Shepherd

The great moped getaway

The moped thief made it about 350km -- over challenging Queensland terrain -- before being caught when he refused to pay for his gas. Passers-by previously had reported a "slow motorbike" on the highway:

Innisfail police Insp David Tucker said he was unaware of what the moped's top speed was, but said it would have struggled over the Cardwell Range.

| Sara Shepherd

Another sad ending to another abusive relationship

From St. Louis, where a man stabbed his wife to death in a car -- while their 7-year-old son looked on.

The woman's son from a previous relationship said William Owens "was always jealous of my mom because my mom was a very attractive lady, and he was a bum living off my mom."

Dwayne Johnson recounted several times that Owens was abusive to his mother, including the time he beat her up in a hotel room in St. Louis County and another time that he allegedly cut the tips off two of her fingers.

| Sara Shepherd

Even levees aren't immune to drunk drivers

As if authorities in Fargo didn't have enough trouble already -- not only is their river flooded, they have drunks trying to drive over the levees, too.

| Sara Shepherd

Hat tip: Another one for Keith G!

Gunman's wife worked at nursing home

UPDATE: The gunman's wife apparently worked at the nursing home, and the two may have been separated.

A new low in mass shootings: A gunman in North Carolina opened fire in a nursing home Sunday, killing seven patients and a nurse before being shot and wounded by a police officer. Three other people -- including the officer -- were hurt.

The patients ranged in age from 78 to 99. Investigators had yet to determine why the gunman targeted the home -- they said he was not an employee and didn't have any relatives living there.

| Sara Shepherd

Photo of suspected shooter Robert Stewart, provided to the AP by the Moore County Sheriff's Office.

No bears on the beach!

Nobody really knows why you would want to, but in the Holy Land you're not allowed to take a bear to the beach. If you're a single woman -- no parachuting on Sundays in Florida. This story includes a few more tips on how not to end up locked up for breaking laws you never would have guessed existed.

| Sara Shepherd

Hat tip: Thanks, Mikeybackwards, for something to help counter-balance all today's bad news!

Deadly morning in KC

Police are investigating two separate homicides, both from overnight.

In the first, a little boy getting ready for school looked out his window and noticed the dead woman's body.

In the second, a man discovered his brother's dead body inside a rental home.

| Sara Shepherd

Open Thread ... Monday

Welcome back to the Open Thread, our blog's space for off-topic comments and discussion. If you've seen an interesting story somewhere else, feel free to post a link below.

PROGRAMMING NOTE: James will be off Monday, and Sara Shepherd will be minding the store. If you need to reach her -- or pass along story tips -- her email is sshepherd@kcstar.com. Please treat her well!

As always, please follow our standard rules: Please sign your comments, and please avoid profanity, as well as racially and sexually abusive language. And when you sign your comments, please use only one nickname. Thanks again, and have a great day!

'Family-on-family' murder-suicide leaves six dead

It happened Sunday night in an upscale neighborhood in Santa Clara.

The lone survivor -- a woman -- is hospitalized with life-threatening wounds.

| Sara Shepherd

Clerk with baton wards off would-be robber

I assume this looked more menacing than the kind people twirl in pageants?

| Sara Shepherd

Accused priest could be your kid's principal

No criminal charges were ever filed against him, because his accuser's lawsuit failed to meet the statute of limitations. Lawyers are trying to get that overturned.

A man defrocked as a priest in 1993 -- and who later was sued for allegedly molesting a former student at a Catholic high school -- is now working at a public high school as an assistant principal.

| Sara Shepherd

Hat tip: Thanks again, Keith G!

Naked pole-vaulter takes Paris

He wanted to draw attention to his, um, sport. I think you'd get arrested for trying to pull this off here, but Paris is more laissez-faire about a lot of things:

The musclebound 31-year-old is seen loping through the streets with his pole as if preparing for a vault at tourist spots like Montmartre and the Pont des Arts across the river Seine. Vous n'avez encore rien vu...

| Sara Shepherd

KC volunteer ordinance unconstitutional?

Had a request for some news from our city council, and it so happens that a motion regarding this was expected to be filed this morning.

Here's the latest with Gloria-gate: Mayor turns up pressure to fight volunteer ordinance

| Sara Shepherd