Saturday, July 19, 2008
Friday, July 18, 2008
Drunk man broke into homes looking for snacks, WI police say
They found him wandering through the streets with salsa and whiskey ...
Hat Tip: Many thanks, JUNGLE JIM!
Thursday, July 17, 2008
Dear ATM thieves: You should watch "Barbershop"
A Kansas City man pleaded guilty in federal court Thursday to trying to steal an automated teller machine. Steven A. White, 50, admitted that on May 11, 2008, he used a pickup and a backhoe — both stolen — to rip an ATM from its base at the North American Savings Bank in Grandview, where police interrupted the theft and arrested White after a mile-long vehicle and foot chase.
Again: STEALING AN ATM IS TOO MUCH WORK. JUST GIVE UP.
Car burglars have awesome weekend in south OP
Overland Park police today warned citizens in the southeastern part of the city to watch for auto burglaries following a rash of them last weekend.
Thieves, mostly working overnight, struck a large number of unlocked vehicles from the area south of 151st east of Metcalf to the city limits, police said.
They recommended people remove all valuables, lock cars and leave outdoor lights on at night to discourage thieves.
The embiggening was mine. No offense, but if you leave your car unlocked, you give up any sympathy from the rest of society.
Another "Funeral Day Burglar" goes away ... for 43 years
From Platte County Prosecutor:
A man who burglarized five Platte County homes—one while the owner was at a funeral visitation for his wife—has been sentenced to 43 years in prison. Dane S. Johnson, 35, of Kansas City, was sentenced July 17 by Circuit Judge Owens Lee Hull, Jr. following his conviction after a May trial.
Platte County Prosecutor Eric Zahnd said, “The victims of these crimes told Judge Hull that, in addition to stealing their valuables, this defendant stole their sense of security. The defendant scanned the obituary pages to plan burglaries and broke into one Platte County home while a man was at the funeral visitation for his wife. Four decades in prison is an appropriate sentence for this series of outrageous crimes.”
Johnson and another man, Landon N. Prothro, 32, of Kansas City, were dubbed the “Funeral Day Burglars” following more than 30 home burglaries in the metro area in late 2005 and early 2006. Several of the burglaries occurred while the home owners were at funerals. Prothro pled guilty in August 2006 and was later sentenced to 28 years in prison.
Wednesday, July 16, 2008
One crook's personal triathlon
Boston police say a thief stole a bicycle and tried to escape officers by pedaling away. When that didn't work, he jumped off a bridge and swam. He eventually got back on a walkway and tried running, which is when they caught him. So, yeah, he's in jail, but he got a terrific workout.
Do you know this man?
From Crime Stoppers: On June 29, 2008, at about 9:45 a.m., a white 1996 Chevrolet Silverado pickup truck with a camper shell was stolen from a church parking lot in the 5100 block of North Old Pike Road.
The truck has not yet been recovered. A check payable to the business belonging to the owner of the truck was taken and cashed at a bank in Gladstone. Surveillance cameras from the bank caught a white male, possibly in his 50's wearing a dark ball cap with white lettering on the front, an unbuttoned dark work shirt over a white t-shirt, blue jeans and tennis shoes, as he cashed the check.
Anyone with information is asked to call Crime Stoppers at 816-474-TIPS, or by leaving an anonymous email tip at KCcrimestoppers.com or a text message tip by texting TIP452 then your information to CRIMES (274637.) A cash reward is available for information leading to an arrest.
"You ain't seen 'bad' yet ... but it's a-coming"*
Great story from Van Buren, Mo., where a suspect reportedly ran away from a courthouse and stole a Buick that had its keys in it. Unfortunately, the car owner's family was on the case and chased him for over 40 miles. It was the relatives who caught the guy after he allegedly ditched the car and ran off.
Snip from the Southeast Missourian:
"I ended up taking him down," said Elijah. "My adrenaline was going and I started gaining on him. He turned around towards me and I didn't know if he was going to punch me or what, so I tackled him and put my knee into his back. After all he'd put me through I had absolute hatred towards the man."
* I'd like to thank everyone for letting me quote my favorite lines from "Next Of Kin."
Tuesday, July 15, 2008
What are the most commonly stolen vehicles in the U.S.?
The National Insurance Crime Bureau has a full report on its Web site. For the second year in a row, the 1995 Honda Civic is the most commonly stolen car in the country. In Missouri, the most stolen vehicle in 2007 was the 2000 Dodge Intrepid. For Kansas, it was the 1992 Chevy Full-Size 1500 pickup.
ANYBODY can be a victim of crime
Por ejemplo: The police chief of Surprise, Ariz., whose uniform, badge, wallet and keys from his locker at the gym. The bad guy also stole his police vehicle, which contained his Glock .40 caliber. (Pretty much the only thing he DIDN'T get was the deed to police headquarters.)
Hat Tip: Many thanks, eephus!
Monday, July 14, 2008
"Maybe they thought it was an awesome bike or maybe they just wanted to play a cruel joke"
Thieves steal a $2K bicycle that was customized so a girl with cerebral palsy could ride it. The only possible good news is this happened near Chicago. If we're REALLY lucky, the Chicago PD will be the ones who find the bad guys and beat them into a coma ...
Hat Tip: Many thanks, JUNGLE JIM!
Thieves steal special earpiece from deaf boy, age 3
Probably because they thought it was a Bluetooth headpiece. It'll be absolutely useless to them, but it's his lifeline to the hearing world.
Dear Burglars: Don't feel like you have to rush off
No, man, you should be like this guy. Sit back, chat a spell with the victims. It'll make it easier for the police to catch up with you ...
Hat Tip: Many thanks, Keith G in PV!
Saturday, July 12, 2008
How NOT to save gas
An Arizona man was furious that several new stop signs had been installed in his neighborhood -- he was wasting gas by stopping at them, after all, police say. So he allegedly went out and took down 10 stop signs.
Hat Tip: Many thanks, eephus!
Friday, July 11, 2008
Wednesday, July 09, 2008
IL man accused of sock burglary ... AGAIN
James Dowdy of Belleville has already gone to prison THREE other times for trying to steal women's socks. Police say they caught him a fourth time on Monday.
Tuesday, July 08, 2008
Do you know this woman and man?
From KCPD: On April 6, 2008 Overland Park Police were contacted by an individual who advised his checking account had been compromised. The victim told the officers someone had made up checks using his account number and personal information and the funds in the amount of $200.00 were missing from his checking account.
The forged checks were passed in retail stores in Overland Park, Kansas. Additionally, other forged checks were passed in Olathe, Kansas and Kansas City, Missouri.
Anyone with information on the two suspects in the attached photos or has information on the crimes associated with these suspects is asked to call the TIPS HOT LINE at 816-474-TIPS.
KCPD investigates $15K home decor heist
From KCPD: On 07-06-2008, at approximately 0608 hours, a trailer containing approximately $15,000.00 in home décor items was reported stolen from 8642 N. Boardwalk in Kansas City, Missouri.
The trailer itself is worth approximately $5,000.00. Surveillance footage of the trailer being towed away by the suspect vehicle was captured from a local retail store. Also, one of the suspects (subject of interest), a white female, was captured on video.
Do you know this woman?
From OP Police: Overland Park Police are asking for the public’s assistance in identifying a female who used a stolen credit card to purchase a $40,000.00 diamond and mounting.
The crime happened in March of 2007 at a jewelry store at 119th Street and Metcalf. The suspect is described B/F, mid 30’s, 5’ 6” to 5’ 7”, 160 to 180 lbs., black hair that came around her chin in “big” curls. The suspect’s car is possibly a newer black Infinity SUV.
Anyone with information on the person or this crime is asked to call the TIPS HOTLINE at 816-474-TIPS. Overland Park Detective assigned to the case is Justin Russell at 913-344-8735.
Nope, I sure didn't see this coming ...
Remember Semaj Booker, 11, the Washington state kid who led police on a car chase and talked his way onto two airplanes at age 9? He's now accused of doing a residential break-in. Ah, kids ...
Hat Tip: Many thanks, JUNGLE JIM!
Monday, July 07, 2008
It takes a special kind of stupid ...
to steal a Taser from a police officer, take turns with your Dad as you zap each other and then post the whole exchange in an online video. Story is from Wisconsin.
Hat Tip: Many thanks, Patty PV!
Thieves still love stealing catalytic converters
USA Today says the going rate for a boosted converter is $50 to $100. Cost of replacement? Anywhere from $200 to $1,000.
Tuesday, July 01, 2008
FL woman kidnapped cat so she could get her dog back, police say
Insane story from the State of Insanity ... Woman loses her dog. Dog goes to the pound, gets adopted. About three weeks later, the owner contacts the pound which contacts the new owners. Who really considered giving the dog back. Except the woman was kind of a jerk, they said.
"But she was very rude and yelled at us and treated us really not very nice," Hollar told WPBF.
A couple of days later, the new owners' cat goes missing. And they get this message from the Dog Lady:
"I was the used-to-be-owner, but I was wondering if you were missing a gray pussy cat. Because a pussy cat ran out in front of my car not far from your house and I saved its life. I almost ran him over. So, I was just wondering how you are enjoying Scooby, because I am enjoying your pussy cat while he is in his crate. You call it crate, I call it a cage. Have a nice day," Urioste is heard saying on a answering machine tape.
Dog Lady is now facing charges of theft and extortion.
Hat Tip: Many thanks, Donna!
Teenage runaway stole charter bus to escape, police say
It was a brilliant plan ... until the part where the BUS CAUGHT FIRE.
IM N UR KITCHEN, USNG UR BLENDR
Arizona police arrested a man who allegedly broke into a stranger's apartment so he could use the blender. Meth may be involved.
Hat Tip: Many thanks, eephus!
Monday, June 30, 2008
Leawood thieves steal thousands in electronics, sports memorabilia
From Crime Stoppers: On early Sunday morning, June 29, 2008, a commercial office building near West 115th Street and Tomahawk Creek Parkway in Leawood was burglarized. The building was still under construction and only one suite was occupied.
Several high-end flat panel TV's were stolen, along with computer equipment and autographed sports memorabilia. The value of the stolen items and damage to the property will reach several thousands of dollars. Two white males who appear to be in their 20's were captured on security cameras.
Anyone with information on the identity of either of these suspects is asked to call Crime Stoppers at 816-474-TIPS. A cash reward is available for information leading to an arrest. The case is being investigated by Det. Jason Ahring, Leawood P.D. who can be reached at 913-642-5555, ext. 209.
Friday, June 27, 2008
Dirty hippies, making the world worse for everyone
At Mr. Zip on Frazier Avenue, clerks said they declined to sell beer to a skinny white male, about 25 years old. He had a California ID, but it was expired.
Clerks said the man returned the next day, walked to the beer cooler, and helped himself to two six-packs. He walked out without paying.
They said they saw him walking down the street with a white couple.
A clerk said the suspect "smells" and the couple with him "look like dirty Hippies."
The Second Coming
Lovely story from Des Moines about a family recovering their missing Nativity Jesus. (Though he now has a swastika painted upon his belly.) This is especially good news for the family's 10-year-old, who no longer has to fill in for the Lord.
Rather than spend more than $1,000 on a new set, Hoffman used dolls or her son, Jack, now 10, as stand-ins for the last six years while Jesus was away from his manger at the West Des Moines Police Department's evidence locker.
"Jack usually didn't last too long," Hoffman said. "It was hard to convince him to lie out there in the freezing cold."
Manure theft goes horribly, horribly wrong
Anytime you ended up naked and coated in cow feces ... it's safe to say that something has gone horribly wrong.
Thursday, June 26, 2008
World's Greatest Getaway
In New York, a burglar was being chased by an apartment super, clad in his pajamas, when a pair of cops showed up. So the burglar yelled, "Stop this crazy guy. He's trying to kill me!" Which is why the police tackled the super and let the burglar get away ... though he was picked up shortly thereafter.
Hat Tip: Many thanks, You're A Mean Drunk R2D2!
Dear Criminals: KCPD would really like its undercover car back, please
Police chased a car Tuesday night mistakenly thinking it was a stolen undercover police car. They continue to look for the tan 1995 four-door Dodge Intrepid taken from the driveway of an undercover police officer May 22.
The trunk held some police equipment, including a bullet-resistant vest, a battering ram and handcuffs. The thief also got away with the officer’s iPod, a black folding knife, flashlight and binoculars. Anyone with information is asked to call the TIPS Hotline at 816-474-TIPS (474-8477).
Wednesday, June 25, 2008
Springfield man pleads guilty to spree of sex-toy burglaries
I think this sort of sums it up:
A probable cause statement read: "Suspect Ray claimed that at the time of the incident he was very high on meth, which he claimed causes him to do crazy things that involves sex toys and pornographic material ..."
I'm your private dancer ...
In California, police are looking for "an overweight, unshaven man in his 30s" who breaks into people's homes and DANCES FOR THEM. He says it's for his fraternity's scavenger hunt. The authorities are pretty sure he's a burglar or a pervert, or maybe both.
Hat Tip: Many thanks, You're A Mean Drunk R2D2!
The Autobahn Pirates
Now THIS is interesting. In Germany, a team of thieves will drive up behind a delivery truck and steal its cargo -- even as the unwitting truck driver keeps traveling down the road. Snip:
In the nighttime darkness, with their lights off, the men drove up behind a transport truck.
Once in place, one man climbed onto the hood of his own car, then used a bolt cutter to break a lock on the trailer door before heaving it open and climbing inside. He then handed boxes of electronics back to a second man on the car hood, who loaded them into the thieves' vehicle, Radecke said.
And they do this sans headlights, so the victimized driver doesn't realize what's going on.
Hat Tip: Many thanks, Jay Tee! Sorry about the delayed HT!
Tuesday, June 24, 2008
Salina priest thwarts collection-plate thief
Great story from the Journal about a priest who finds a thief looting the collection plate on a Sunday afternoon. The thief ran into another room -- so the priest locked him inside there. The crook eventually escaped by jumping 10 to 12 feet from a window.
How much did the church lose? About $2. Way to be, Father Carlos!
Dear Friends: Maybe you shouldn't trust strangers named "Weasel."
Lovely story from New Mexico, where a man asked police to help him find his missing car. Reportedly, the man had been drinking and getting high with a dude named Weasel. (That's all he knows about him, his name is Weasel.) Our protagonist got sick, so Weasel drove him home ... and then borrowed his car, a Buick, for an errand that apparently continues.
Hat Tip: Saw this via News of the Weird!
Good dog
Sad story from Hudson, Fla., where Baxter, a boxer, chased away two burglars from his master's home -- and was then fatally shot as they ran off.
Monday, June 23, 2008
Friday, June 20, 2008
A new low
Stealing veterans' grave markers so the metal can be sold for scrap. Story is from Ottumwa, Iowa.
Hat Tip: Many thanks, You're A Mean Drunk R2D2!
Report: As the economy sinks, shoplifting climbs
That's according to USA Today, which reports that several retailers are noticing a jump in shoplifting since the economy soured. A lot of cases, they say, involve stolen food.
MO man goes to prison for stealing Nat Light from bar
Seriously, shouldn't we get him some help for his unhealthy love of crappy beer? He sounds like he has dangerously low self-esteem.
Thursday, June 19, 2008
WyCo man recovers stolen ATV, thanks to Craigslist
KMBC has a great story about a WyCo man who got a tip about his stolen ATV thanks to a notice he put on Craigslist. Then he proceeded to go get what was his:
"I grabbed my firearm, strapped it on and headed over there at 80 mph," Hall said.
A kiss to build a conviction on
An Arizona man is accused of breaking into a woman's house specifically so he could kiss her. Riiiight.
Hat Tip: Many thanks to our Arizona correspondent, eephus. Pray for his continued health and sanity amidst so much evil.
Wednesday, June 18, 2008
Cook tries to hide stolen lobster tails in his pants, police say
"Hey, is that a frozen lobster tail in your pants or are you ... oh, it is. Never mind."
Hat Tip: Many thanks, Patty PV!
Former OP detective accused of shoplifting, meth possession
Former police officer Donald Kevin Duncan was charged this week with shoplifting and drug possession.
Duncan, 37, of Shawnee, is accused of stealing computer hard drives on Saturday from the Costco at 12221 Blue Valley Parkway. Police said they also found methamphetamines on Duncan when he was arrested.
A police spokesman said Duncan is a former investigations detective with the Overland Park police. He was with the agency from 1995 to 2005, left voluntarily and now owns a private consulting business.
Hat Tip: Many thanks, kmb
Tuesday, June 17, 2008
Bad and Worse
Bad: Using a company credit card for private purchases.
Worse: Using part of the money to buy "male-enhancement pills."
Elderly couple accused of stealing kid's bicycle
There's actually more to the story, though. The couple thought the bike was part of a lot they bought at a church rummage sale for $11. Only the bicycle was there to be blessed by the minister. The police later caught up with the couple, who received a ticket for theft.
Hat Tip: Many thanks, kmb!
Prior planning prevents poor performance
Hat Tip: Many thanks, eephus!
Monday, June 16, 2008
Dear Criminals: If you're lucky enough to escape the police ...
... it's considered poor form to go to their headquarters and ask them to remove your handcuffs.
Hat Tip: Many thanks, Goshel!
Friday, June 13, 2008
Something awful happened to Charlie The Tuna
Beloved spokesfish stolen from Oregon town, eventually returned -- but as a fraction of what he used to be. (One-half, to be specific.)
(AP Photo/The World, Lou Sennick)
CT man stole school bus after officers arrested his ride home, police say
I don't really think they can blame the guy for allegedly stealing the school bus. How else was he supposed to get home? They'd already incarcerated his buddy -- and ride home -- earlier in the evening.
Hat Tip: Many thanks, kmb!
Thursday, June 12, 2008
Do you know this woman?
Raytown police are trying to find the woman in the photos above. Someone's wallet was reported stolen on June 1, and police suspect this woman might have used the victim's credit card and checkbook. Anyone with information is asked to call the Crime Stoppers TIPS Hotline at (816) 474-TIPS (474-8477).
Wednesday, June 11, 2008
$2 million jewelry burglary includes Super Bowl rings
Story is from Massachusetts, though the rings -- priced at $25K apiece -- were intended for New York Giants staff members. (The players and coaches already have theirs, whew.) The crooks apparently cut a hole in the roof and somehow escaped with a 1,000-pound safe.
Photo via the AP
Tuesday, June 10, 2008
$30K Torah stolen from MO synagogue
The Torah includes the first five books of Jewish scripture -- in this case, it was in the form of a handwritten scroll, worth about $30K. This took place in University City, near St. Louis, though police say there have been similar thefts in other cities.
Meanwhile, in Raytown
A motorist and two Raytown detectives were taken to the hospital Monday afternoon with injuries they received after police responded to a burglary report.
The incident started just before 1 p.m. at a home in the 5600 block of Ditzler Avenue. It ended after a chase onto eastbound Missouri 350 and Raytown Road resulted in a collision with another motorist.
The driver of the vehicle that collided with the suspects’ car went to a hospital with what police described as injuries that were not life-threatening. The two detectives suffered minor injuries.
Monday, June 09, 2008
Saturday, June 07, 2008
Friday, June 06, 2008
Thursday, June 05, 2008
California attorney accused of stealing Sausage McMuffins
Great post here by CrimeRant ...
File photo of the far superior Egg McMuffin.
Fool me once, shame on you
Fool me twice, I'll blast several large holes in your pickup and then hunt you down ...
Kennebec County Sheriff's Department Sgt. Chris Cowan stands in front of a pickup truck in Augusta, Maine that was shot up during an alleged scrap metal theft Tuesday June 3, 2008. (AP Photo/Kennebec Journal, Andy Molloy)
Wednesday, June 04, 2008
A new low
How audacious are copper thieves? They've literally stolen Jesus off the cross.
Luckily, there's a happy ending ...
UT woman tried to steal gold bracelets by swallowing them, police say
I can't imagine eating gold is a smart move, but this took place at a pawn shop, police say. Lord knows where those bracelets have been ...
Green Bay running back beats burglar with piece of furniture
Hat Tip: Many thanks, You're A Mean Drunk R2D2!
Tuesday, June 03, 2008
KMBC: Burglars hitting OP apartment during the daytime
They've hit the Highland and Essix Place complexes near 103rd and 69 Highway. Snip:
Investigators said the burglars left behind a calling card -- damage to the doorway, where they pried open the locks.
I hate to nitpick, but a calling card is when the Pengui