Not remotely crime-related

A Florida woman receives a license with a glaring error.

Hat Tip: Many thanks, You're A Mean Drunk R2D2!

Is this offensive? Or harmless?

Not a crime story, just interesting: New Jersey has revoked a set of vanity license plates reading "BIOCH" after someone complained. It's a misspelling of a made-up word, biotch, which often replaces ... well, use your imagination. The license plates' owner is nonplussed. From the New York Daily News:

"It sort of makes me feel like almost an invasion of privacy or taking away your freedom of speech," said Romano, 49, a mom of three grown sons from Manville.

"It's a plate. It's not a word really. It's made up, and if you want to get technical, it's spelled b-i-o-t-c-h."

Not remotely crime-related

Not a crime story, just interesting: Gwinnett County, Georgia, is asking 180 employees to pay back bonuses they were mistakenly given -- in 1994. The county is seeking about $39,000 total. The workers can pay it back or apply their vacation days to paying off the debt.

Hat Tip: Many thanks, Tȟatȟaŋka Wansila (One Bull)!

Not remotely crime-related

From the UK Sun: A young mum died after a doctors failed to spot a six-inch long toilet brush handle embedded in her buttock, a judicial investigation into her death was told.

Technically, this isn't a crime ...

In Virginia, a teenage baseball player got into trouble after he reportedly urinated on field during the National Anthem before one of his school's games, the Bristol Herald Courier reports. Sources tell the paper that it was done on a dare. (Check out the quotes from the various adults involved; everybody's being surprisingly level-headed.)

A dark day for nude entertainment

Missouri legislators have passed new restrictions on adult businesses. From the AP:

Legislation sent to the governor tonight would ban nudity, alcohol and anyone under age 18 at strip clubs, adult video stores and other sexual businesses. It also would force them to close at midnight and prohibit them from locating near homes, schools, churches and various other places.

Topless woman saves the day

No, it's not a crime story, but I thought it would appeal to segments of our readership.

Not remotely crime-related

A British woman was shocked to find a lone, naughty "jelly baby" in her bag of Candy King. The company is now investigating, The Sun reports:

The two-inch pink sweet - in the shape of a naked man holding his midget gems - popped up in a pack of pick'n'mix.

| Sara Shepherd

Not remotely crime-related

In Morgan Hill, Calif., five teenagers got into trouble for wearing U.S. flag T-shirts and bandannas to their high school on Cinco de Mayo. The building administrators threatened to suspend them for refusing to change clothes, though it appears the school district is going to overrule them, the boys said. The T-shirts were allegedly viewed as "incendiary," and school staff worried there could be fights.

Hat Tip: Many thanks, Jane and kmp!

Out-of-this-world kidnapping

Kirsan Ilyumzhinov, the Russian republic of Kalmykia, has told a Russian TV anchor that he was abducted by aliens in September 1997.

Ilyumzhinov reportedly said:

“I believe I talked to them and saw them. I perhaps wouldn’t believe it if it wasn’t for 3 witnesses -- my driver, my minister and my assistant.”

| Bob Cronkleton

Dance Party Friday

A group of soldiers, stationed in Afghanistan, chose to shoot their own remake of a Lady Gaga song. And then unwisely posted it to the Internet.

That is a lovely parking job

From AP: A car is seen after going through the wall on the 6th floor of a parking garage in Tulsa, Okla. on Wednesday April 28, 2010. No injuries were reported. (AP Photo/Tulsa World, Tom Gilbert)

Not remotely crime-related

An Idaho woman claims that her cat tried to kill her. A couple of points ...

1. The cat is named after a character in the "Twilight" books. But I'm not judging.

2. The woman has given the cat to a shelter, which is the pet equivalent of being given a one-way plane ticket back to Russia.

Not remotely crime-related

The Cub Scouts are offering a pin for playing video games.

Hat Tip: Many thanks, Rhonda!

Not remotely crime-related

In one California county, officials have passed a rule that would stop McDonald's from putting toys in its Happy Meals. What's next, Cali? Public executions for Ronald and Grimace? 

Not remotely crime-related

Firefighters save dog wedged inside owner's recliner.

Hat Tip: Many thanks, cripjak!

Do kids have a right to buy 'Grand Theft Auto'?

Not a crime story, just an interesting case: A court knocked down a California law that forbid stores from selling violent video games to anybody under the age of 18. The U.S. Supreme Court has now agreed to hear arguments in the case. Video-game companies had sued to stop the law, saying that it limited First Amendment protection of their games. Cali legislators say the law was needed to protect young people and cited studies showing a correlation between violent games and aggressive or antisocial behavior.

Not remotely crime-related

According to a new report, about 33 SEC officials were busy downloading pornography at work when they should have been, you know, trying to prevent the worst economic crisis since the Great Depression. From CNN ...

Separately, a senior attorney at SEC headquarters admitted to downloading pornography up to eight hours a day, according to the investigation.

"In fact, this attorney downloaded so much pornography to his government computer that he exhausted the available space on the computer hard drive and downloaded pornography to CDs or DVDs that he accumulated in boxes in his office," the inspector general's report said.

Suit claims gay athletic group discriminated against bisexual players

Three bisexual men have sued a gay athletic group, saying their team was forced to forfeit their second-place win in the Gay Softball World Series because "they weren't gay enough," their lawyer says. (Not a crime, just an interesting civil suit.) 

Following the championship game, which D2 lost, Apilado, Charles and Russ were each separately called into a conference room in front of more than 25 people for a "hearing" by the Gay Amateur Athletic Alliance to determine whether each was "heterosexual" or "gay," the lawsuit says.

... At one point during the proceedings, the lawsuit alleges, one of the plaintiffs was told: "This is the Gay World Series, not the Bisexual World Series."

Straight men are able to play in the league, but teams are limited to two such players. The attorney for the athletic group says they have a right to freedom of association -- otherwise, there could be entire teams of heterosexuals competing in the gay softball league.

Hat Tip: Many thanks, Chuck McRizzo!

Klan wants to have picnic at historic site

From AP: A federal judge in Kansas City has scheduled arguments in the case of a Ku Klux Klan group that was denied a picnic permit at a state historic site in southeast Missouri.

The Traditionalist American Knights of the Ku Klux Klan sought the permit to gather at the Fort Davidson State Historic Site. The site is a Civil War battlefield about 70 miles southwest of St. Louis. The state Department of Natural Resources denied the permit in March. The agency based its decision partly on what it called “historical inaccuracies” in the Klan group’s literature.

Not remotely crime-related

Iranian cleric says that women who dress immodestly are inciting young people to have extramarital sex, which causes earthquakes. You're welcome, science.

Hat Tip: Many thanks, cripjak!

Razor blade in sandwich not criminal matter, police say

A man filed a police report after he bit into a piece of razor blade left in his Sonic chicken wrap, but police investigated and say nothing criminal happened -- it was apparently an accident, Kevin Wright reports at the Olathe News. The restaurant offered $200 and an apology. The story says he hasn't decided whether he'll take further legal action.

If the coconut hits you, it's your own fault

In New Orleans, a woman is suing because she was hit in the head by a hollowed-out coconut, which was thrown during the city's famous Zulu parade, which is part of the Mardi Gras celebration. What's interesting is that Louisiana law specifically says that, if you get hit in the head with a coconut at the Zulu parade, the coconut-thrower is exempt from liability. They've had a LOT of lawsuits involving coconuts, it seems ...

Not remotely crime-related

At one Atlantic City high school, the lunch ladies took revenge on students after there was a food fight that had been coordinated beforehand: For two days, the students were served cheese sandwiches only. Thankfully, the parents are standing strong with the school:

“It’s a prison meal,” said Bridgitte Reid, a parent of one high school student. “They can’t do this.”

Reid was so enraged after her daughter explained what she ate Wednesday, she eventually argued directly with school officials, marched into the cafeteria and snatched one of the cheese sandwiches for evidence of the “crime.”

Hat Tip: Many thanks, cripjak!

Please stop touching the naked people

At New York's Museum of Modern Art, a new show includes several performers who stand around naked. The museum is asking visitors to stop touching the naked people as it's, well, just creepy as hell. Snip:

One performer, Will Rawls, told The New York Times that a patron brushed his hand chest and back "and then touched my butt."

"As he was passing me he looked me in the eyes and said 'You feel good, man,"' Rawls said.

I'm sure it was intended as a compliment. (Not remotely crime-related ... though maybe if Guiliani were still mayor.)