Fear not this 'Factor' but do avoid it

"Fear Factor," the NBC series that premieres at 7 tonight on Channel 41, is basically "Jackass" with a jackpot. Do something hideously stupid that no thinking person would do and win big prizes (if your idea of a big prize is $50,000 before taxes). NBC has been running those "Fear Factor" promos nonstop - you know, the one where 400 rats swarm over a female contestant, people jump from one semi-truck to the next, etc. According to NBC, you'll also see a contestant "lie still while covered in live snakes," as if there were any other way to act around live snakes, and you'll see two contestants dragged by horses down a muddy street. Remember the good old days of "Guinness World Records" and the guy who drank more ketchup than anyone else? Can we get that back? Please? Well, it's no "Network," but "The Beast," ABC's summer series about a fictional 24-hour news channel, projects a very curious fantasy about journalism that - in this journalist's opinion, at least - makes it highly watchable. "The Beast," which premieres at 9 p.m. Wednesday on Channel 9, imagines a network where editorial meetings are aired live on the Web; where journalists are encouraged to lard up their stories with personal biases; and where executions are broadcast live and in deathly color. And it's pretty much held together by the force of Frank Langella, who cherry-picks from Howard Beale, Citizen Kane and "The Truman Show's" Christof to create his character, Jackson Burns. Burns is a hands-on media mogul who exhorts his charges to do stories "from the heart." "I want them to see us struggle with the truth the way they struggle with the truth," Jackson says about his viewers. But unlike "The West Wing," where that kind of earnestness has turned into script poison, Jackson converts it into fire and fuel, then feeds it to "The Beast." That is, television. I'll admit it: I am not a student of the soap operas. I cannot deconstruct the telenovela, although thanks to the Internet, I do know how to mix a "Mar-Timmy." But I think I know why many young people today watch the soaps. They think they're hilarious. None of that nauseating Rosie O'Donnell fan worship. Not for today's smarter soaper. The campier the show, the weirder the scripts, the dumber the actors, all the better. That would explain what MTV had in mind with "Spyder Games," the daily soap it launched last week. "Spyder Games," which airs at 2 p.m. (with repeats at 10 p.m.), has all the icons of the genre: the small town, the dynastic family, the endless opportunities for mate-swapping and back-stabbing. It is conventional as can be, right down to the overlit video quality, the glycerin teardrops and the hokey eavesdropping scenes. What's different is that no one of consequence on "Spyder Games" is over the age of 30. This show makes "Dawson's Creek" look geriatric. What MTV is doing is obvious - it's hijacking the next generation of soap watchers from the networks. And smothering them in the kind of sexual gymnastics that makes MTV's other steamy series, "Undressed," seem practically tepid. For those of you unhappy because you heard KCPT had chickened out of showing a film that's critical of Wal-Mart, one word: Relax. "Store Wars: When Wal-Mart Comes to Town" is a documentary chronicling the story of a small Virginia town whose citizens do battle with the discount chain. The people who are trying to keep Wal-Mart from building stores near their homes in Lee's Summit and Overland Park think their neighbors should see the film. So do I. But "Store Wars" was only an optional offering to PBS stations, many of which aren't going to air it. Channel 19 decided to delay the airdate because it has a pledge drive going on this weekend. KCPT's Cynthia Smith said the film will air locally sometime in August. If you can't wait that long, then call up a friend in Johnson County who has cable. "Store Wars" is airing at 9 tonight on Topeka's public station, KTWU (repeating overnight at 1 and 4 a.m.). For those of you who missed Spike Lee's wicked satire of the TV business, "Bamboozled," which played only briefly in local theaters, you can watch it on inDemand pay-per-view during June. - You can reach Aaron Barnhart at www.tvbarn.com @ART CAPTION:Contestants perform risky stunts for prizes on NBC's "Fear Factor." @ART:Photo (color) @ART CREDIT:NBC >>>