Anthrax raises issues for local stations; Scares force news directors to set or change policies

For Michael Sipes, it took the powdered sugar doughnut incident to convince him that yes, an anthrax threat is very much like a bomb threat. On Oct. 12, an NBC News employee tested positive for anthrax, setting off a wild weekend in which public health officials across the country were bombarded with reports of suspicious white powdery substances. And wherever the hazardous-materials truck went, TV news trucks were in hot pursuit. Kansas City was no exception. That Friday, when hazmat responded to a non-emergency call from The Kansas City Star, three news crews covered the incident, including KMBC, Channel 9, where Sipes is the news director. (The white substance in a coin wrapper turned out to be a talcumlike powder routinely used to make coins easier to handle.) Over the next four days the list of possible anthrax reports grew longer and nuttier. Salt found on a restaurant table. Powdered detergent next to a washing machine. The one that beat all, though, was the story of the Overland Park woman who reported an unknown white powder in her backseat just after dropping off her kids at school. Upon questioning, the woman recalled the children had eaten powdered sugar doughnuts that morning. Though at least two TV stations received that report, neither passed it along to viewers. By then it was dawning on local news managers that reporting every anthrax scare might make an already nervous public more jittery - and worse, rouse hoaxsters. "It got to the point Monday where I was about to pull my hair out," Sipes said. "We were feeding unwarranted concern." After three boys were arrested at Indian Hills Middle School in connection with an anthrax hoax, Sipes drew the line. On Tuesday he told Channel 9 staffers not to air anthrax reports unless someone tests positive. (That hasn't happened in the Kansas City area.) Yet Sipes left open the possibility that the station would report on future anthrax scares if, as in the case of Indian Hills, they proved to be disruptive. "If they're evacuating the Claycomo plant, yes, we'll cover that. But a letter in a mailbox, no," Sipes said. Reaction was similar at the three other local news stations last week, as managers found their philosophy on reporting anthrax scares evolving by the day. By Wednesday the Indian Hills hoax had become the focus. Anthrax the menace was now anthrax the nuisance. "Everybody here is aware of the potential for creating a situation where fake announcements of threats happen," said Don North, news director for KCTV, Channel 5. "We don't report the vast majority of bomb threats, either." Yet several anxiety-filled days passed before this consensus emerged among news managers. Why didn't it seem obvious sooner? The news managers pointed out that hardly anybody knew much about anthrax until two weeks ago, and even then the messages were decidedly mixed. A 1998 report by ABC, which was repeated by other media, reported that "one billionth of a gram of anthrax" could kill. Other outlets, however, emphasized how hard it would be to contaminate one person with anthrax, let alone thousands. This made it hard to put anthrax into perspective. So did the gusto with which area hazmat crews responded to those first anthrax reports. It was no surprise that TV news people would find irresistible the sound of multiple sirens and the sight of emergency trucks rushing to the scene of potential bioterrorism. But these early reports lacked a happy ending - or any ending at all - and this only fueled more fear and more false alarms. "With a bomb scare, the bomb squad goes in, has a look, comes out, says, 'No bomb,' and people go back to work," said Laura Clark, news director of KSHB, Channel 41. "You really can't determine on the scene if it's anthrax or not." Some critics say local newscasters should have known not to cover anthrax threats in the first place. "This was local TV news at its worst," said Craig Allen, an assistant journalism professor at Arizona State University. Allen's opinion carries some weight. A 20-year veteran of local TV news, he often defends his colleagues when other media critics do not. ABC, CBS and NBC had good reason for reporting the anthrax story - they were targets of the anthrax mailers. Newscasters in places like Kansas City, Allen said, had no such excuse. "They localized a national story, and they shouldn't have," Allen said. "They were like lemmings running off the end of a diving board." In his colleagues' defense, KMBC's Sipes noted that these have been trying times for the news media. Since Sept. 11 he has had to reassess his station's policy on everything from images of the World Trade Center attacks to reporting takeoffs of B-2 bombers from Whiteman Air Force Base. "Every time we turn around we have to make an editorial judgment we've never had to make before," Sipes said. It would seem that local TV news is asking its viewers for something TV news rarely displays itself: patience. To reach Aaron Barnhart, phone (816) 234-4790 or visit the TV Barn Web site at www.tvbarn.com

WWF comes to town with ratings in free fall

The World Wrestling Federation will come stomping into Kansas City tonight for a live broadcast of "Raw," the WWF's signature cable TV show. A full house is expected at Kemper Arena for the two-hour program, which airs at 8 p.m. on TNN - but who besides diehard fans will be watching? Nielsen ratings for "Raw" were in a free fall before the Sept. 11 terrorist attacks. Since then, the WWF's tightly scripted brawls have paled next to the real-life fireworks on the news channels. Even those still watching "Raw" (and related programs like UPN's "Smackdown") are grumbling. "The WWF shows aren't must-see TV anymore," complained Wade Keller in his column last week for "Pro Wrestling Torch," a fan newsletter. It wasn't supposed to be this way. After acquiring his two main rivals - World Championship Wrestling and Extreme Championship Wrestling - earlier this year, WWF head honcho Vince McMahon seemed to have built himself a tag team for the ages. With the elimination of WCW's "Nitro" - a show that competed against "Raw" on Mondays - the WWF promised to "propel the sports entertainment genre to new heights." (And you thought pro wrestling was just a muscle-bound soap opera. That's "sports entertainment genre" to you, mister.) Instead of climbing to new heights, however, "Raw" has fallen out of the virtual ring (ratings down 20 percent since Aug. 20), crashed through the proverbial folding table (last week's broadcast was the lowest-rated of the year) and onto the figurative floor (dish maker DirecTV canceled its pay-per-view deal with WWF). Fans say that the WWF's vaunted "story lines" - which determine not only the winners and losers but also direct all the shenanigans between bouts - have gotten tired and predictable. That McMahon's obsession with TV showmanship has been fed at the expense of quality matches. The WWF counters that this is just a phase pro wrestling goes through every few years. "There's no rhyme or reason to these big ratings swings," said a spokesman for WWF Entertainment, who added that "Raw" is still the highest-rated entertainment series on cable. Tonight's show is the first since Sunday night's pay-per-view telecast from St. Louis. The WWF spokesman last week promised several "intriguing" story lines during the pay-per-view that would carry over to tonight's telecast. The popular kids' show "Blue's Clues" is adding a member to its family of two-dimensional cutout characters. At 7 tonight on Nickelodeon, Steve, Blue and the gang welcome home Mr. Salt and Mrs. Pepper and their new baby. No, we do not know the baby's seasoning. Lisa Kudrow supplies the voice of the obstetrician. (That's a big word, isn't it, boys and girls?) Those of you lucky enough to get the new National Geographic Channel on satellite TV can watch the timely premiere of "Frontline Diaries," a series with first-hand accounts of journalists about their adventures in foreign lands. Tonight at 8, Sebastian Junger (who wrote The Perfect Storm) records his travels through Afghanistan with Ahmad Shah Massoud, the recently assassinated head of that country's rebel Northern Alliance. (For those of you without a dish, Time Warner Cable plans to add the channel later this year.) I don't usually like to shill for "The E! True Hollywood Story," or as I like to call it, "Biography for Dummies." But that was before CBS dumbed down its Sunday-night movie showcase with that "True Hollywood Story" wannabe about "Gilligan's Island." So I might as well mention two new "True Hollywood Story" episodes this week on E! The first, airing at 7 p.m. Wednesday, looks at the attempted murder trial of aristocrat Claus Von Bulow. It's a bit of a stretch to call this a "Hollywood story," though Von Bulow's mistress once appeared on the ABC soaper "Dark Shadows" and Jeremy Irons won an Oscar playing a creepy Von Bulow in "Reversal of Fortune." At 7 p.m. Sunday, E! takes a long, loving look at "L.A. Law." The two-hour special is done as only E! can do it - with so many teases, recaps and commercial breaks it makes the 10 o'clock news seem like a model of restraint. - To reach Aaron Barnhart, phone (816) 234-4790 or visit the TV Barn Web site at www.tvbarn.com. @ART CAPTION:Rob Van Dam prepares to splash down on Tazz. The World Wrestling Federation comes to town tonight. @ART:Photo (color) @ART CREDIT:WWF @ART CAPTION:Stork doc and Blue in the baby hospital @ART:Graphic (color illustration)

Stamp your ticket for 'Smallville'

'Smallville' Airs: 8 p.m., WB (Channel 62) Stars: Tom Welling, Kristin Kreuk, Michael Rosenbaum, Eric Johnson, Sam Jones III, Allison Mack, Annette O'Toole, John Schneider Most closely resembles: "Superboy" Aaron's advice: Try it. This is the latest live-action incarnation of the story of the Man of Steel, told in the inimitable teen-oriented style of the WB. There's plenty to mock about this show: its "Dawson's Creek" homages to adolescent love, the preposterous notion of tousle-haired Clark Kent (Welling) being the class nerd at Smallville High and having no shot at dating lovely Lana Lang (Kristin Kreuk), at least not until later this season. And one more thing: A town in Kansas of 50,000 souls is not "smallville"! With all that, "Smallville" roped me in. The most intriguing premise is that young Clark is only starting to grasp the enormity of his arriving on Earth a dozen years earlier. So is the chance encounter that begins a curious friendship with another boy in town, Lex Luthor (Rosenbaum). The fate of "Smallville" hinges on the job it does in developing the relationships among Clark, Lana and Lex and in revealing (or concealing) Superman's secret as he begins to set his eyes beyond Kansas. Aaron Barnhart's fall TV preview is online at www.kansascity.com. @ART CAPTION:Tom Welling as Clark Kent and Kristin Kreuk as Lana Lang @ART CREDIT:WB @ART:Photo (color)

Kurtis anniversary show keeps focus on death penalty

Bill Kurtis was looking for a "big" story to tell for the 10th anniversary edition of A&E's "Investigative Reports". So he and his team produced a hard-hitting, two-hour report on the questions being raised about the death penalty. They finished work in August, two months before the program's scheduled air date. Then came Sept. 11, and suddenly his big story was overshadowed - as was every other news story. Yet Kurtis' two-hour special on capital punishment is airing on schedule, with not one change to the original program. And it's just as worth your while to catch at 8 p.m. Tuesday. "It's a break from all of the Trade Center coverage," Kurtis said by phone from Wichita last week. (He's a native of southeastern Kansas and owns a ranch near Sedan.) Still, the death penalty is hardly escapist fare. And although this is ultimately a compliment to Kurtis and crew, "Investigative Reports" doesn't make it any easier on the viewer with its carefully arrived-at conclusion that the death penalty system in America is, all in all, a mess. The program's lead expert, Columbia University law professor James Liebman, co-authored a landmark study published last year that found 68 percent of all capital convictions between 1973 and 1995 had "serious" errors. A chilling statistic, but when "Investigative Reports" puts human faces on the problem, the results are truly sickening. Four men are profiled; all are currently on death row; all are fighting uphill battles to have their cases overturned. Yet after hearing their stories, many viewers might well ask why these four are still behind bars. In one case, the judge had been feuding with the accused - yet refused to step down from the trial. In another, the defense lawyer did cocaine outside the courtroom and fell asleep inside it. (In fact, the Columbia study singles out incompetent lawyers - usually low-paid public defenders - as the No. 1 cause of wrongful death sentences.) What especially enraged Kurtis, who also holds a law degree from Washburn University in Topeka, were the number of cases in which witnesses lied to jurors or withheld evidence that would have helped the defendant. "We were taught that testimonies were incontrovertible truth," said Kurtis, adding, with a rueful laugh, "Now we know they're nothing." Kurtis doesn't think this is a problem politicians will be able to solve. The legal profession, he believes, will reform the system "once they realize it's not working." (To that end, Kurtis said he may write a book on the death penalty.) Meanwhile he is working on his next "Investigative Reports" blockbuster, scheduled for November. This one might get a little more attention. It's on bioterrorism. But maybe this will get some viewers' attention: The only countries that allow juveniles to be put to death are Pakistan, Iran, Nigeria, Saudi Arabia and Yemen. And the United States. "Third Watch," the NBC drama in which actors pretend to be New York City firefighters, police officers and paramedics, has decided to pay tribute to their real-life counterparts in light of the Sept. 11 attacks. That's no surprise. What is surprising is the size of the tribute: Not one, not two, but three episodes, spanning four hours of prime time. The first airs at 8 tonight on NBC (Channel 41). In the two-hour "non-scripted episode," the actors "will interact with their heroic, real-life New York City counterparts," according to NBC. Next week the fictional rescuers perform their fake rescues on Sept. 10, the day before the bombings. The trilogy concludes Oct. 29 in an episode scripted for one week after the attacks. New York's finest and bravest are worthy of every tribute directed their way. It's just a shame they had to be called in to rescue this unremarkable, middling-rated TV show. An NBC program much more deserving of your attention is "Scrubs," the adrenaline-charged comedy about first-year doctors. Despite being one of the most blisteringly sarcastic shows to come along in years, "Scrubs" has a thoughtful side, too, as it imparts little lessons about the medical profession. Tuesday's episode (8:30 p.m., Channel 41) tackles a serious subject - what are known as "end of life issues" - with surprising grace and comic warmth. "The West Wing's" late Mrs. Landingham (Kathryn Joosten) is a guest star and, yes, she just might die again. "Masterpiece Theatre," which recently made a historic move from Sunday to Monday nights, begins its second season of featuring American authors with an adaptation of Eudora Welty's "The Ponder Heart" at 8 tonight on Channel 19. To reach Aaron Barnhart, phone (816) 234-4790 or visit the TV Barn Web site at www.tvbarn.com.

WB unleashes insulting comedies

'Men, Women & Dogs' Airs: 7:30 p.m. Sunday, WB (Channel 62) Stars: Bill Bellamy (right), Danny Pino, Niklaus Lange, Mike Damus, Heather Stephens Most closely resembles: The worst meat-market singles bar you ever spent 22 minutes in Aaron's advice: Forget it. This truly unpleasant sex-com features four young bachelors who meet at the dog park and talk about the best way to get a woman into bed. It is one of the most complete objectifications of women TV has seen in a long time (the "women & dogs" in the show title says it all). What's worse, the show airs on a network that makes no secret of appealing to teen-agers. Neither this show nor "Off Centre" should be watched alone by anyone under 18, but odds are that's just who the majority of those watching will be. 'Off Centre' Airs: 8:30 p.m. Sunday, WB (Channel 62) Stars: Eddie Kaye Thomas, Sean Maguire, Lauren Stamile, John Cho, Jason George Most closely resembles: "Men, Women & Dogs" Aaron's advice: Burn it. Simply put, the worst new show of the fall. From the creators of that hormonal teen classic "American Pie" comes this dreadful comedy about the sexcapades of two guys - a Brit (Thomas, the nerd from the "Pie" films) and an American (Maguire) - in one of those fabulously expensive pads you see only on TV shows. In one show, everybody gets venereal disease. In another, watch out when somebody finds the porno tapes! Ho ho! And here's the big laugh on you, Mom and Dad: "Off Centre" is aimed directly at your teen-age daughter (the quintessential WB viewer). Aaron Barnhart's fall TV preview is online at www.kansascity.com. @ART:Photo (color, uncaptioned)

An older, grittier 'Survivor' starts tonight

They'll be eating maize instead of rice and dodging scorpions more often than spiders. Listen to the familiar New Age theme music and you will hear the voices of African children. Those are the more superficial changes viewers will notice when the CBS adventure-game megahit "Survivor" returns for a third edition at 7 tonight on Channel 5 with 16 new contestants and a new locale: a game reserve in the heart of Kenya. In contrast to the trim urban hotties of "Survivor 2," these survivors are older (many of them in their 40s), more rural and, at least in the beginning, chubbier. In the United States, they carry the mail, tend bar, herd goats and play pro soccer. In Africa, they will seek out what little shade is available, subsist on extreme lo-cal diets and try to summon the strength for competitions that "Survivor" host Jeff Probst calls "bigger and more demanding than any we've done before." The show's creator, Mark Burnett, says tonight's episode will get off to a galloping start, not unlike "Survivor 2," which opened with the turbulent arrival of a military plane on a remote Australian airstrip. "We go from zero to 60 in about one second in the first episode," Burnett promised reporters in a recent conference call. Although the broad contours of the game won't change - tribal councils every three days, for example - Probst said viewers will see new challenges and rule changes, "just to make sure the survivors don't know the direction the game will go." For most Americans tuning in tonight, this will be their first view of Kenya since news reports brought video of the 1998 terrorist bombing of the U.S. Embassy in Nairobi. That attack, like the Sept. 11 attacks on the East Coast, was linked to Osama bin Laden. The game was completed before last month's tragedy, and the beginning of U.S. retaliation. Burnett said he made no changes to the finished episodes in response to the attacks. "That did not even cross my mind," said Burnett, adding, "It's just a TV show." @ART CAPTION:Jessie Camacho (left) and Kelly Goldsmith are players in "Survivor: Africa," the third of CBS' back-to-nature contests, this one set in Kenya's Shaba National Reserve. It's scheduled to start at 7 tonight on Channel 5. @ART:Photo (color) @ART CREDIT:CBS

TV reporters prepared, but lack of video makes coverage tough

When the inevitable happened, the major TV news outlets were ready. They had been as surprised as anyone by the timing of the airstrikes on Afghanistan, but you wouldn't have known from watching their coverage Sunday afternoon. With three weeks to prepare, ABC, CBS, Fox, CNN and NBC all seamlessly reported the opening salvos in what could be the most heavily televised war in history. Yet there was so little video to televise on Sunday that people who monitored the day's events by car radio didn't miss much. Americans have been told to return to their normal lives. They've also been told that life will never be the same as before. Sunday's news coverage captured that ambivalence perfectly. It marked a turning point in the West's war on terrorism, yet the lack of available details - visual or otherwise - seemed to drain all urgency out of the moment. For example, no sooner did NBC's Tom Brokaw declare that the Sept. 11 attacks "altered American life in ways no one could have anticipated one month ago" than his network signed him off so it could carry the last half-hour of a NASCAR race. Whatever altered American life, it apparently didn't take away its appetite for motor sports. One indicator that things have not returned to normal: The Emmy Awards were called off for a second time. If they are canceled outright, it will be the first time in the event's 53-year history. The Emmys originally were scheduled for Sept. 16 in Los Angeles, but the attacks forced a change in date, venue and format. The television academy planned a subdued telecast paying homage to the heroes and victims of the attacks. A portion was to have aired from New York, an admission that celebrities, like other Americans, are nervous about air travel. By 3:30 p.m. only one of the four local network affiliates was still carrying coverage of the airstrikes. Fox affiliate WDAF, Channel 4, and CBS affiliate KCTV, Channel 5, both carried football games. The exception was KMBC, Channel 9, where ABC's Peter Jennings presided over what has been TV's most visually restrained coverage of Sept. 11 and its aftermath. ABC has put no slogans on its screen, no animated flags, no news ticker, no on-screen text summarizing what was just said five seconds ago. Only Jennings in his shirtsleeves and an ABC logo in the corner. At the other extreme, Fox News Channel used a Halloween-themed typeface for its on-air slogan ("America Strikes Back") and repeatedly used a flashy animation in which the words zoomed onto the screen: America! Strikes! Back! And that was some of the more compelling video on Sunday. For all their preparations, the networks had precious little to show in the hours after the raids. On one videotape, acquired from the Arabic network Al Jazeera, you could see a few flecks of light in the black Afghani night. They sailed toward the horizon and then just seemed to vanish. A minor ruckus broke out among the news channels over that video. Al Jazeera had granted CNN an exclusive six-hour window for any pictures taken off its air - including the videotape of Osama bin Laden released soon after the bombing. Though CNN's Aaron Brown mentioned the "exclusive" video of the air strikes, within minutes Fox and NBC were showing it as well. CNN briefly bristled, but decided not to fight for its exclusive. Given the paucity of useful video, that was a noble sacrifice to make. CNN also trumpeted "exclusive" pictures from Afghanistan, sent by videophone. But there was nothing to see: just a haze of night-vision photography, ill-defined shades of phosphorous green, a grainy tableau that looked like the bottom of the ocean. President Bush chose an interesting backdrop for his address announcing the airstrikes - a window that looked out on the Jefferson Memorial and, behind the president, street traffic. If the visual was meant to show the nation's capital getting back to normal, it succeeded. However, the networks seemed to rely more heavily on video of another address given later on Sunday by British Prime Minister Tony Blair. Americans love a British accent, and Blair - who has become a media fixture in recent days - also has a fine ear for language. When he described Sunday's events as "a moment of the utmost gravity," it came as close as anything to weighing the true measure of what had begun that day out of the view of Western cameras. You can reach Aaron Barnhart at (816) 234-4790 or through the TV Barn Web site at www.tvbarn.com

'Centre St.' earns a favorable verdict

"100 Centre St.," the intelligent and emotionally honest series about the lawyers and judges of New York's rough-and-tumble night court, returns for a second season at 8 tonight on A&E. Alan Arkin and LaTanya Richardson star in the series directed by the legendary Sidney Lumet. Lumet honed his craft doing live TV dramas in the 1950s before going to Hollywood to direct "Dog Day Afternoon," "The Verdict" and the greatest movie-about-television of all time, "Network." "100 Centre St." was originally pitched to NBC, which turned it down, probably because Lumet refuses to make his characters gallop at the manic pace dictated by network shows like "The Practice" and "Ally McBeal." Also, the characters don't shout at one another as they do on the networks. Lumet's people talk - and talk and talk - in conversations that have a natural sound and rhythm to them. That may have something to do with the way Lumet shoots each scene. He uses three high-def cameras working in tandem, as opposed to the usual single-camera method that forces actors to recite the same lines over and over, disrupting the flow of conversation. It's great to see a long-overlooked actor like Arkin step into the role of Joe Rifkind, a night court judge accused by his enemies of giving out lenient sentences. But Richardson is even better as an African-American judge who is tough on crime, yet warm and understanding toward her old friend Rifkind. This season two more appealing characters join "100 Centre St.": Bobby Cannavale as J.J., a fast-talking assistant D.A. so full of himself you can't help but like him; and Michole Briana White as Fatima, a luscious lawyer - and devout Catholic - swept up in J.J.'s wake. Back in Action 1: "Ed" returns for a second season at 7 Wednesday on NBC (Channel 41). Early on, Nancy (Jana Marie Hupp), who has just quit her job, announces that she is finally going to get around to reading A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius. Perfect: A quirky book for a quirky TV show. "Ed" will be followed at 8 by the "real" season premiere of "The West Wing." Back in Action 2: "Roswell," the show about teen-age space aliens, mysteriously vanished from the WB schedule this summer - only to reappear on another network. Its third season begins at 8 p.m. Tuesday on UPN (Channel 29), following "Buffy the Vampire Slayer." Local treasure "Rare Visions and Roadside Revelations" embarks on its fifth season of exploring chain link sculptures, gingerbread houses, big balls of twine, questionable medical devices and assorted folk-art creations. It airs at 7:30 p.m. Thursdays on KCPT, Channel 19, through Nov. 8. To reach Aaron Barnhart, phone (816) 234-4790 or visit the TV Barn Web site at www.tvbarn.com. @ART CAPTION:Alan Arkin @ART:Photo (color)

Long-faced Emmys could be 'Telethon redux'; TV ceremony could be trading one form of self-importance for another

After the tragic events of last month, it is natural to wonder if this weekend's Emmy Awards have lost some of their meaning. The answer is no. The Emmy Awards are just as meaningless as they were before the tragedy. A ceremony that singles out the same four or five performers in each category year after year, that rewards popular shows and shuns unpopular ones, that is shamelessly fueled on groupthink - in other words, a ceremony run not unlike your old high school - is begging not to be taken seriously. Unfortunately, serious events have overshadowed this year's Emmys, so much so that some members of the Academy of Television Arts and Sciences wanted the event canceled. Instead, the telecast was pushed back three weeks (it originally was scheduled for Sept. 16, five days after the terrorist attacks) and completely retooled. This year's Emmys will be a solemn affair with limited music, no red-carpet pre-show pageant and a "unity dinner" to replace the traditional after-show Governors' Ball. The voice of America himself, Walter Cronkite, will say a few words near the start of the broadcast. The producers have even mandated "dressy business attire" for Emmy attendees, apparently in the belief that more revealing attire would be insufficiently respectful toward the victims of the tragedy. To be sure, some of these are responses to legitimate security concerns - removing the public from the red-carpet area, for instance. But the presence of Uncle Walter suggests a larger agenda, as do other alterations being made by Emmys executive producer Don Mischer. In a statement Mischer said he is preparing videotaped tributes to air during the broadcast "to honor the heroes of the tragic events that took place Sept. 11." Mischer added, "It will not be the Emmy Awards as usual." Not to belittle any academy members, and certainly not to demean anyone who died or suffered in those heinous attacks, but Mischer is wrong. It will be the Emmy Awards as usual - a somewhat self-inflated celebration of the light entertainment that exists mainly to distract us from our daily cares and generate millions upon millions of dollars for Hollywood. There is nothing wrong with paying tribute to the heroes of Sept. 11, though many of TV's top stars already did that last month on the "America: A Tribute to Heroes" telethon that raised $150 million for relief efforts. The academy lost one of its own in the attacks: David Angell, the co-creator of "Frasier," who with his wife, Lynn, was aboard one of the flights that crashed into the World Trade Center. It's only right that the Emmys remember the Angells and all the victims of that terrible day. But if tonight's broadcast is simply going to be telethon redux - a parade of long faces, heavy ballads and muted emotions - all the academy will have done is substitute one form of self-importance for another. Do Americans really need that much handholding? Yes, people remain riveted to the unfolding crisis, and ratings are way up for cable news. But ratings are up for some of TV's silliest shows. "The King of Queens" and "That's Life," for instance, soared to record levels in their season premieres. Besides, no matter how many cosmetic changes are made to the Emmys, the main reason we tune in is to see who won and who lost. And in that regard, everything is just as it was before Sept. 11. "Buffy the Vampire Slayer" will not suddenly materialize in the list for Best Drama. Chris Rock will compete for talk-show honors, and the much more deserving Conan O'Brien will not. If these Emmys play out like those in past years, viewers will be arguing on Monday about the shows that got robbed, the actors who deserved to win and the actresses who didn't, and we will all realize why we must have the Emmys, even in the bad years. They can be irritating, they're probably irrelevant - but the annual ritual is irreplaceable. So then, let the handicapping begin. Among the competitions being decided tonight, four stand out because the voters are likely to pick the favorites to win instead of those whose performances clearly stood out last season. In the Best Drama category, "The Sopranos," which will undoubtedly take home several Emmys, will once again be denied the prize it most richly deserves. Instead, Aaron Sorkin, creator of "The West Wing," will address the nation just four days after his special episode, written after the Sept. 11 attacks, has aired on NBC. Intoxicated by the moment (and, given his probation, nothing else), Sorkin will no doubt use his acceptance speech to comment on the actual world events from which he spins his fictional fluff. In the Best Comedy category, "Will & Grace" or "Frasier" are likely to repeat previous wins. But the most worthy choice is "Malcolm in the Middle," a show that single-handedly changed how sitcoms are made, without laugh tracks or predictable set-up/punchline schemes. "Malcolm's" frenetic pacing, outsized characters and wild twists will be imitated by many Emmy winners to come, so it would be a shame if the progenitor went unhonored. In the Best Actress/Drama category, the question is which of the two nominees from "The Sopranos" will win. Edie Falco is better known and the incumbent, but Lorraine Bracco's portrayal of a psychiatrist who endures a brutal assault - then wrestles with her overwhelming desire for revenge - was so gripping, not even the academy could overlook it. Could it? Finally, Best Supporting Actor/Comedy will probably go once again to "Will & Grace" showboat Sean Hayes. But Robert Downey Jr. simply fast-talked his way past Hayes and all the other nominees during his brief stay on "Ally McBeal." Downey, who was kicked off the show after another tangle with the law, is one guy whose career prospects won't improve if he wins an Emmy. That doesn't mean he shouldn't have it. You can reach Aaron Barnhart through the TV Barn Web site at www.tvbarn.com The Emmys go bicoastal The Emmy Awards will be shown live from the Shrine Auditorium in Los Angeles and from Conan O'Brien's studio at NBC in New York at 7 tonight on CBS (Channel 5). The Emmys used to do a bicoastal broadcast every year, but this year it's being done to accommodate any of the nearly 100 New York nominees who don't want to fly to Los Angeles. Four or five of the 27 total prime-time awards will be presented in New York. "We think it's the right thing to do," executive producer Don Mischer told The Associated Press. "Linking New York and Los Angeles is very appropriate given what we've been going through in the last few weeks." A short list of prime-time Emmy nominations Nominees in major categories for the Emmy Awards, to be broadcast at 7 tonight on CBS. Drama Series: "ER," NBC; "Law & Order," NBC; "The Practice," ABC; "The Sopranos," HBO; "The West Wing," NBC. Comedy Series: "Everybody Loves Raymond," CBS; "Frasier," NBC; "Malcolm in the Middle," Fox; "Sex and the City," HBO; "Will & Grace," NBC. Miniseries: "Anne Frank," ABC; "Armistead Maupin's Further Tales of the City," Showtime; "Horatio Hornblower," A&E; "Life With Judy Garland: Me and My Shadows," ABC; "Nuremberg," TNT. Made-for-TV Movie: "Conspiracy," HBO; "For Love or Country: The Arturo Sandoval Story," HBO; "Laughter on the 23rd Floor," Showtime; "61," HBO; "Wit," HBO. Variety, Music or Comedy Series: "The Chris Rock Show," HBO; "The Daily Show With Jon Stewart," Comedy Central; "Late Show With David Letterman," CBS; "Politically Incorrect With Bill Maher," ABC; "Saturday Night Live," NBC. Variety, Music or Comedy Special: "73rd Annual Academy Awards," ABC; "Bruce Springsteen & the E Street Band," HBO; "Cirque Du Soleil's Dralion," Bravo; "Ellen DeGeneres: The Beginning," HBO; "Saturday Night Live's Presidential Bash 2000," NBC. Actor, Drama Series: Andre Braugher, "Gideon's Crossing," ABC; Dennis Franz, "NYPD Blue," ABC; James Gandolfini, "The Sopranos," HBO; Rob Lowe, "The West Wing," NBC; Martin Sheen, "The West Wing," NBC. Actress, Drama Series: Lorraine Bracco, "The Sopranos," HBO; Amy Brenneman, "Judging Amy," CBS; Edie Falco, "The Sopranos," HBO; Marg Helgenberger, "CSI: Crime Scene Investigations," CBS; Sela Ward, "Once & Again," ABC. Supporting Actor, Drama Series: Michael Imperioli, "The Sopranos," HBO; Dominic Chianese, "The Sopranos," HBO; Bradley Whitford, "The West Wing," NBC; John Spencer, "The West Wing," NBC; Richard Schiff, "The West Wing," NBC. Supporting Actress, Drama Series: Maura Tierney, "ER," NBC; Tyne Daly, "Judging Amy," CBS; Aida Turturro, "The Sopranos," HBO; Stockard Channing, "The West Wing," NBC; Allison Janney, "The West Wing," NBC. Actor, Comedy Series: Kelsey Grammer, "Frasier," NBC; John Lithgow, "3rd Rock From the Sun," NBC; Eric McCormack, "Will & Grace," NBC; Frankie Muniz, "Malcolm in the Middle," Fox; Ray Romano, "Everybody Loves Raymond," CBS. Actress, Comedy Series: Calista Flockhart, "Ally McBeal," Fox; Jane Kaczmarek, "Malcolm in the Middle," Fox; Debra Messing, "Will & Grace," NBC; Sarah Jessica Parker, "Sex and the City," HBO; Patricia Heaton, "Everybody Loves Raymond," CBS. Supporting Actor, Comedy Series: Peter MacNicol, "Ally McBeal," Fox; Robert Downey Jr., "Ally McBeal," Fox; Peter Boyle, "Everybody Loves Raymond," CBS; David Hyde Pierce, "Frasier," NBC; Sean Hayes, "Will & Grace," NBC. Supporting Actress, Comedy Series: Doris Roberts, "Everybody Loves Raymond," CBS; Jennifer Aniston, "Friends," NBC; Lisa Kudrow, "Friends," NBC; Kim Cattrall, "Sex and the City," HBO; Megan Mullally, "Will & Grace," NBC. Actor, Miniseries or a Movie: Kenneth Branagh, "Conspiracy," Andy Garcia, "For Love or Country: The Arturo Sandoval Story," HBO; Gregory Hines, "Bojangles," Showtime; Ben Kingsley, "Anne Frank," ABC; Barry Pepper, "61," HBO. Actress, Miniseries or a Movie: Judy Davis, "Life With Judy Garland: Me and My Shadows," ABC; Judi Dench, "Last of the Blonde Bombshells," HBO; Hannah Taylor Gordon, "Anne Frank," ABC; Holly Hunter, "When Billie Beat Bobby," ABC; Emma Thompson, "Wit," HBO. - The Associated Press @ART CAPTION:Frankie Muniz and the cast of 'Malcolm in the Middle' @ART CREDIT:Fox @ART CAPTION:Megan Mullally, Eric McCormack, Debra Messing and Sean Hayes of 'Will & Grace' @ART CREDIT:NBC @ART CAPTION:Robert Downey Jr. deserves an Emmy for his performance on "Ally McBeal" last season. @ART CREDIT:Fox @ART CAPTION:Edie Falco of 'The Sopranos' @ART CAPTION:Lorraine Bracco is nominated for Best Actress/Drama for her work on "The Sopranos." @ART CREDIT:HBO @ART:Photos (5, color)

This show is dead, Jim

'According to Jim' Airs: 7:30 p.m., ABC (Channel 9) Stars: Jim Belushi, Courtney Thorne-Smith, Kimberly Williams, Larry Joe Campbell, three cute kids Most closely resembles: "My Wife and Kids" Aaron's advice: Forget it. In an obvious attempt to extend the audience of its existing hit "My Wife and Kids" to a full hour, ABC cooked up this lukewarm family comedy. The 47-year-old Belushi, who only looks like he's 46 on TV, is paired with 32-year-old ex-"Ally McBeal" beauty Courtney Thorne-Smith, who looks 22 on TV. Older man, younger woman, telegenic kids: It's as if your favorite local news team made whoopee. "According to Jim" feels like the sixth variation of a detergent brand that you know is only there to take up shelf space. Aaron Barnhart's fall TV preview is online at www.kansascity.com. @ART CAPTION:According to Jim @ART:Photo (color)

'Patterson' needs self-improvement

'Bob Patterson' Airs: 8 p.m., ABC (Channel 9) Stars: Jason Alexander, Jennifer Aspen, Phil Buckman, James Guidice, Robert Klein, Chandra Wilson Most closely resembles: A Dabney Coleman "comedy" Aaron's advice: Forget it Bob Patterson, the promos tell us, is "the nation's No. 3 motivational speaker," and it gives you some idea of the show's own potential for growth that the promo is more clever than the first two episodes. Jason Alexander plays the empowering speaker who has a serious case of personal disempowerment: His pitch is getting stale, things at the office are out of control and he can't even keep his ex-wife out of his house. It's a potentially funny premise, but the life is beaten out of it midway through the pilot episode. Alexander is on the short end, literally and figuratively, of the show's oversized ensemble and undersized joke writing. If "Bob Patterson" is to survive the fall, it will need to take some of the self-improvement advice it's so intent on mocking. Aaron Barnhart's fall TV preview is online at www.kansascity.com @ART CAPTION:Jason Alexander stars in "Bob Patterson." @ART:Photo (color)

From any perspective, 'Life 360' is a winner

In a medium so attuned to duplication and derivation that one minute only your neighbor knows what "CSI" stands for and the next minute Jill Hennessy is walking around in a white coat and halter top pretending to be a medical examiner, the new PBS series "Life 360" is a revelation. There is no other show remotely like it on television, and it's not likely that there will be anytime soon. "Life 360," which begins at 9 p.m. Friday on KCPT (Channel 19), is a bold attempt to reinvent the TV newsmagazine by telling stories about people you don't usually see on the news. It is also a wild pasta salad starched with animation, performance and comedy, the ingredients chosen to give each episode its own distinct flavor. It isn't the "NewsHour." It's more like Jim Lehrer's daughter living in SoHo and teaching at a multi-culti high school. Michel Martin, the "Nightline" correspondent who is host of "Life 360," compares it to a print magazine, with longer articles, some short items, first-person stories, fiction and cartoons. The show is co-produced by the ABC news program, and many "Nightline" crew members work behind the scenes. "Nightline's" Robert Krulwich also shows up in the first episode - or rather, the cartoon Krulwich - in an imaginatively drawn short that proves we all are connected to Julius Caesar's famous last words. Playwright Anna Deavere Smith delivers a monologue about the connectedness of all Americans. Stand-up comic Jake Johannsen does much the same while being whisked, Bill Nye-like, through cyberspace. The small-world episode also will feature Jewel singing a new song. "Life 360" is not only non-commercial, but also its demanding content and lack of hype make it decidedly anti-commercial. Though part of Martin's job is to walk us from one segment to the next, viewers must shift gears mentally and emotionally to keep up. For instance, until the events of Sept. 11 intervened, Johannsen's frolic was to have been followed by a moody reminiscence by author Ron Suskind of watching the moon landing on TV in 1969. "We just felt that despite the large number of channels on TV, there wasn't a broad variety available," Martin says. "I remember someone asked Toni Morrison - this was years ago - why she wrote her book The Bluest Eye. And she said, 'I wrote a book that I wanted to read.' That's how we feel about this." Martin, who was filming a "Life 360" segment two miles from the World Trade Center when it was destroyed, said stories about the Sept. 11 aftermath will be folded into the first episode. "In a way, this is a spinoff of the 'Nightline' Friday Night Special," says Martin, referring to what we in Kansas City call the Wee Hours of Saturday Morning Special. "It's like 'A Different World' was to 'The Cosby Show.' You know, some of the same cast was there, but they had their own stories." Well, sometimes the best way to describe a new show is just to watch it. I recommend highly that you watch this one. Thirteen one-hour episodes will air weekly, then "Life 360" will be replaced by another PBS program, tentatively titled "Public Square." "Buffy the Vampire Slayer" returns - same time, different channel - and like the show itself, reports of Buffy's demise have been at times exaggerated. Still, viewers whose last memory of the slayer is her gravestone in last season's finale may be surprised to see Sarah Michelle Gellar high-kicking the zombies in the opening scene of the two-hour season premiere airing at 7 p.m. Tuesday on UPN (Channel 29). But we soon learn that appearances are deceiving, and it won't be so easy to reunite our heroine with her Scooby comrades. The episode largely belongs to Willow (Alyson Hannigan), the redheaded wonder who has come on strong in recent years and may be one of TV's least likely breakout characters. She's mesmerizing as she labors to bring Buffy back from the dead. You know she's not going to fail, but that doesn't diminish the suspense. And this show's talent at inserting zingers into even the most morbid situations is unmatched. You know the "extreme" fad is done, over, stick a fork in it when you open your mail and find a preview tape for something called "Extreme Garages." That's just one of the allegedly adventuresome programs HGTV will air during its "Extreme Week," starting today. Actually, HGTV shows can be fast-paced, addictive fun. But "Extreme Garages" (8 p.m. Sunday, HGTV) is mostly about rich guys who build spacious adjuncts behind their homes to store their classic cars. As part of our growing fascination with all things CSI, "Shots in the Dark" (9 p.m. Tuesday, Court TV) delves into the grim and graphic world of crime-scene photography. It is noteworthy in that it marks a rare video appearance by book publisher and New York socialite Harold Evans, who narrates the special. - To reach Aaron Barnhart, phone (816) 234-4790 or visit the TV Barn Web site at www.tvbarn.com @ART CAPTION:Michel Martin, host of PBS' 'Life 360' @ART:Photo @ART CREDIT:PBS

Late-night hosts struggle for something - anything - to joke about

They say the age of irony is over. Well, chew on this: Bill Maher landed the biggest fiasco in his career because he went back to doing his job like a good American. In the aftermath of the Sept. 11 terrorist attacks, other late-night hosts suddenly stopped riffing on the news of the day. Not Maher. The host of ABC's "Politically Incorrect" kept the story on the front burner - and got scorched. During a discussion on his Sept. 17 show, Maher used the word "cowardly" to describe previous U.S. military strikes against Serbia. After several stations dropped his show, Maher apologized for his comments (which, by the way, other critics on both the left and right had made in the past word for word). Not since Mort Sahl called the Kennedy assassination a "conspiracy" has a comedian sparked this kind of firestorm around his political views. But at least Maher was being politically incorrect, as advertised. Flip around the dial during late nights and you'll see his counterparts - men who mined a famous double-murder case and an impeachment for laughs - grasping to say anything funny since the Sept. 11 terrorist bombings that left more than 6,000 dead or missing. David Letterman has been pulling 10-year-old comedy routines out of dry storage. Craig Kilborn scrapped his "In the News" segment for something called "World of Whimsy." And saddest of all, the staff of "The Daily Show With Jon Stewart," whose tart-tongued political commentary won a Peabody Award and other accolades in recent months, have turned to mocking Fox TV shows and Michael Jordan's unretirement. Topical humor is supposed to be the sustenance of late-night comedy. But these hosts have lost their appetite for it. For Letterman and Stewart, who are based in New York, and who both made emotional returns to television after the tragedy, the feeling of revulsion seems especially raw. So instead, their late-night shows are turning into group therapy, as news anchors and public officials take the places on the guest couch usually reserved for supermodels. Hillary Rodham Clinton was Letterman's guest Thursday night, and every time she said "the president" - not her husband but the current White House occupant - the crowd applauded noisily. Therapy, however, comes in many forms, and not all of them are so politically correct. This came to mind while reading the new issue of The Onion (www.theonion.com), the wonderfully vicious newspaper parody published out of New York. After a two-week hiatus, The Onion writers have returned with an astonishing issue that summons up all of our pent-up rage at the people who concocted this evil deed and exacts the kind of revenge that only our humorists can get away with. "Hijackers Surprised to Find Selves in Hell," reads the headline of one story, which then goes on in detail (nauseating detail, in fact) to describe the eternal torments being inflicted on the terrorists. Another story, "God Angrily Clarifies 'Don't Kill' Rule," purports to be an interview with the Almighty. The headline is the only thing remotely funny about it, yet in its fury the article neatly summarizes the moral bewilderment of anyone who has wondered how people could murder thousands in the name of religion. (Jerry Falwell gets his comeuppance, too, but in language I can't repeat; The Onion, unlike The Star, is not a family newspaper.) Other pieces poke fun at some of the absurdities already emerging out of the aftermath of the attacks: "President Urges Calm, Restraint Among Nation's Ballad Singers" is a gentle jab at the solemnity of the recent celebrity telethon. "Not Knowing What Else to Do, Woman Bakes American-Flag Cake" is even gentler but makes its point. Another headline reads, "Irony, Cynicism May Be Permanently Obsolete." But The Onion's heartfelt rant proves the opposite. Meanwhile, Jay Leno has begun cracking jokes about the Taliban. Did you hear that the Taliban are scared and going into hiding? Yeah, now they know how the women of Afghanistan feel. Leno's audience laughed at that - a guiltless, cathartic laugh America needs more of. - You can reach Aaron Barnhart through the TV Barn Web site at www.tvbarn.com. @ART CAPTION:Jon Stewart of 'The Daily Show' @ART:Photo (color)