TV Barn's TV Picks for Oct. 30

LAST CALL
"The Bob Newhart Show" inspired most modern "drinking games" because of its frequent use of the phrase "Hi, Bob." If you watched all of the episodes in the series, how many drinks will you have consumed?

A) 149
B) 256
C) 365
D) 560
E) 842

[Say hello to our little friend, the correct answer, at the bottom of the column.]

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TV Barn's TV Picks for Monday, October 30, 2006
by Tom Heald with Jon Delfin
All times Eastern
For PBS programs, check local listings

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6 p.m.
"It Takes a Thief" (Discovery)

6:30 p.m.
"Off the Leash" (Lifetime)

8 p.m.
The NBC promo department tells us that NCAA college basketball coach Tracee Jones does in fact have a million dollar case on "Deal or No Deal" (NBC). Naturally this means she'll be taking a bribe from the banker.

T-Bag tries to reunite with his old bag, C-Note's wife faces her own final decision, Lincoln and L.J. head on the run, and Michael moves in on Mahoney's Mrs. on "Prison Break" (Fox).

While working the register for the first time, guess who gets robbed at bully-point? Just another reason why "Everybody Hates Chris" (CW).

TELE-GEBRA
"Crossing Over With John Edward" - a Y chromosome = "Lisa Williams: Life Among the Dead" (Lifetime)

"High Stakes Poker" (GSN; also 9)

8:30 p.m.
Robert dates a purse snatcher's victim with a secret of her own that shocks "All of Us" (CW).

Battle of the oversized hats (ESPN).

"Masterchef Goes Large" (BBC America)

9 p.m.
A former soldier may have created his own battle plan, leaving "Cracker" with "A New Terror" (BBC America).

Hiro is tempted by a high roller, Claire is taunted with the possibility of meeting her biological parents, Niki's ex-husband comes a-callin', and Suresh heads to India on "Heroes: Save the TiVo Season Pass" (NBC).

Lara Flynn Boyle, Mark-Paul Gosselaar and Colin Ferguson are haunted by "The House Next Door" (Lifetime).

Yellow fever takes its toll on the men with the plan at the Panama Canal on the "American Experience" (PBS).

"Girlfriends" (CW) debate the finer points of moving "Toward More Picturesque Speech" when describing graphic sexuality over the phone. This may also be found in Reader's Digest as "Humor in Uniform."

"The Bachelor: Rome" (ABC) is treated to "The Gun Collection: Miami," "Abstinent Evangelism: San Diego," "Pilates and Creepy Wedding Dress: Portland" and "Untranslated: Venice."

RIPPED FROM THE HEADLINES OF JULY 1999
"Justice" (Fox) uses the plane crash deaths of John-John and Carolyn Bessette as its canvas.

Gentrification gets dressed down on "Bowery Dish" (Sundance).

Meanwhile, gentrification gets praised on "WWE Monday Night RAW" (USA).

"Angel Rodriguez" (HBO)
"Engineering an Empire" (History): "Aztec Tech"
"100 Greatest Songs of the '80s" (VH1; also 10): 100-61
"Biker Build-Off" (Discovery): Matt Hotch vs. Roger Goldammer
"The Dog Whisperer" (National Geographic)

9:30 p.m.
"The Game" (CW) is both X-Box (getting an opponent to play) and a pony (getting your mommy to pay).

10 p.m.
Brian and Adam both try to move on by searching for a new hot babe both of them can obsessively stalk together on "What About Brian" (ABC), or "Hallmark Hall of Fame Presents Maxim Magazine."

"Friday Night Lights" (NBC) sneak-previews tomorrow's episode involving a choice between a second-string quarterback and a new recruit. And we all know that in cases like this, the hunkier dude like totally always wins ('n' stuff).

EVERY TIME YOU GO AWAY
Does practice make perfect? Why would anyone steal a doorknob? My way or Uruguay? What's the worst possible movie that someone could quote at an elementary school graduation? And do you flip your mortarboards at this one? What's the second worst body part that someone could use to identify you? Did "Queer as Folk" make Pittsburgh seem too glamorous? Does J.K. Rowling watch the show? What does Celia have in common with Barney Fife? What cultural stereotypes are true? Is a kiss just a kiss? Why would anyone drink a Cactus Cooler? Should calories be the only thing you're worrying about? Can't the universe just give us a good sign? Are the children really our future, or had Whitney Houston already started doing heavy drugs when she sang that? These questions -- and many others -- will be answered in the season finale of "Weeds" (Showtime). Or not.

THEY MIGHT BE THE SUBJECTS OF A DOCUMENTARY
"Gigantic: A Tale of Two Johns" (Starz Cinema)

"Jacob & Joshua: Nemesis Rising" (Logo)
"Disorderly Conduct: Video on Patrol" (Spike)
"The Investigators" (Court)
"Made" (MTV): "Soccer"
"Gene Simmons Family Jewels" (A&E; season finale): "Behind the Makeup"
"The Animal Extractors" (National Geographic): "Raccoon Attack"
"Dr. 90210" (E!): "Always Be Repaired, Eh?"
"Animal Cops Houston" (Animal Planet)

midnight
"Smoking Gun" (Cartoon)

TALK TO THE HAND
* Rose: TBA at charlierose.com
* LeBron James is a shoe-in as a guest for "The Daily Show."
* Dan Rather and Carly Fiorina report for duty with Tavis.
* Barry Manilow writes the songs that make Stephen sing.
* Sacha Baron Cohen, Jerry Springer and Beck bore at Dave.
* Tim Allen, Carrie Underwood and Gwyn Mackenzie are a dependent clause for Jay.
* Charles Barkley bites Conan, Kristin Chenoweth and Cat Power.
* Kim Raver, Bob Saget and Deana Carter & Heart escape from Craig.

For more late-night and some daytime listings, visit interbridge.com/lineupsdate.html

SALUTATIONS
It's reported that "over the course of the series, the phrase, 'Hi, Bob' was said B) 256 times. Howard Borden (Bill Daily) said it a total of 118 times. Dr. Jerry Robinson (Peter Bonerz) logged 43. Carol Kester (Marcia Wallace): 36 times and Emily Hartley (Suzanne Pleshette): 17 times. Minor characters or guest stars said it 43 times, and Bob Hartley (Bob Newhart) even said it once himself."

-- posted by Jon Delfin

Comments

you are all ass holes

Posted by: | October 30, 2006 at 09:00 AM

Aaron -

I saw a blurb in the paper (this weekend?) from you about Studio 60, where you mentioned that you were pretty disgusted with the show. I was surprised, as I've liked it quite a bit, particularly the Christine Lahti arc, and I like the way Matthew Perry's character is portrayed. He's showing a little more depth than I've seen before.

What is it that has you so down on the show, and what is the deal with them pre-empting this week's episode?

Thanks.

Posted by: rhonda | October 30, 2006 at 09:19 AM