Talk about endurance

Just got an alert from NBCOlympics.com: "Men's 5000m speed skating final starts soon!"   

Rhymes with 'no dice'

Just now watching Thursday's "American Idol."

Is it me, or does Bo Bice now have less talent than he did when he was a contestant on the show?

A few years ago, we were told that sketch comedy was on the decline because nervous network executives had begun monitoring minute-by-minute Nielsen ratings. And apparently, when a crummy sketch came on, they could see the viewers fleeing.

So it says something about the "Idol" audience that the producers see fit to have low-end contestants like Kinnik get to sing perfectly dreadful "swansongs," even though the voters have already indicated they think she's a talentless bore. I'm not sure what it says about "Idol's" audience is flattering, but they don't switch away even then.

TV Barn Radio alert

You're not seeing double. This item was briefly posted Wednesday but the segment was moved.

Twin Cities today: The Clear Channel-Fox News-Rush Limbaugh talker KTLK-FM (not to be confused with the Air America-Al Franken talker in Los Angeles, KTLK-AM) will have me on to talk TV at 6:10 p.m. CT today. One of the hosts is Brian Lambert, former St. Paul Pioneer Press TV critic and all around great guy. Looks like you can listen live.

Brav ... oh.

Bravo put out a press release crowing that the "Project Runway" finale garnered 3.4 million viewers, "smashing" the old record "to become the most viewed telecast in network history."

Wow, what an achievement!

And to think, it came within 600,000 viewers of the first episode of "Black. White," which got 4 million people for its broadcast, also last night, also on a cable channel, but without anywhere near the kind of marketing hype that "Runway" has accumulated this season.

Maybe that's because one isn't a knockoff of a UPN show but an original idea. You remember original ideas, don't you?

Brian Lamb: Today's best person in the worrrrrrrrld

On the jump, most of the transcript between the founder of C-SPAN and MSNBC's Keith Olbermann, who continues to demonstrate why he's both too good for cable and perfectly suited to cable, especially as a thorn on the TV grid directly adjacent to Fox's Bill O'Reilly.

NBC's 40th late-night victory lap

Four sweeps a year, counting July, times 10 years ... that's how long Jay Leno has been dominating the competition.

Somewhat more surprising in NBC's gloat-a-gram is this tidbit: "Last Call with Carson Daly" owns the 18-34 demographic over Kimmel and Ferguson, whose programs air earlier in the evening.   

Gordon Parks tribute

One of the Starz channels will pay tribute to the renaissance man from Kansas on Friday.    (Also read down for the item, "Gordon Parks, RIP.")

CW throws more bucks at yuks

The CW network is making clear what direction it's headed:

Link: CW Commits To Second Comedy.

Hey, it's the oldest rule in the book -- get a hit comedy, you can print money for years. The WB forgot that, which is why it lived unhappily ever after.

Boston responds

The Media Access Group at WGBH has responded to Joe Clark's editorial, which I linked to below.

In the fall of 2005, WGBH's Media Access Group consolidated its off-line captioning services by expanding its Los Angeles production facility where the majority of its commercial clients are located.  At the same time, staff was reduced at its Boston offline captioning operation.

Nevermind

Today's radio gig moved to Friday at 6.

'Galactica' renewed

The question I get asked these days more than any other is, "When is The Shield/Monk/The Closer coming back?" The next most frequently asked question: "Did they cancel The Shield/Monk/The Closer?"

The irony is that these are cable shows. Cable is notorious for rerunning programs into the ground. But lately, they've gotten awfully protective of their hit shows. They vanish for long hiatuses, much longer than on network TV, in order (one assumes) to protect their specialness.

Well, then jot this down, fans of "Battlestar Galactica." Its season finale is Friday, and it's not coming back for seven months. And then it'll be back with a vengeance: 20 episodes, or two more than will be produced this season of "Commander in Chief." (PR on the jump.)

Gordon Parks, RIP

The charter school in our neighborhood is called Gordon Parks Elementary. It doesn't serve the upper-middle-class children fleeing Kansas City's public schools. It serves at-risk kids, and serves them well. We're delighted they're here, and so was Gordon Parks.

Lisa Gutierrez, who works two desks down from me and has been following Parks for some years now, has the obit:

Link: Kansas City Star | 03/08/2006 | ‘A great loss for Kansas’.

I disagree with that sentiment. Gordon was 93; he was not long for this world. But he is coming home. He asked to be buried under the big tree, the "learning tree," in his hometown of Fort Scott. The town whose racism he fled as a young man. A town that's still reeling from the fire that gutted its historic district last year. Gordon Parks is coming home -- that's a great gift to Kansas.

And if the call letters had been KWCE....?

I guess you would call this an upset, if it were a game -- the CW did not award its Kansas City franchise to the company that owns both the WB and CBS affiliates in town. Aaron Barnhart has the unbearably detailed report.

Link: Kansas City Star | KCWE snags new network

Why closed captioning will soon suck

I use closed captions constantly. I have no problem hearing the TV set; I just enjoy having the printed word accompanying the action, and it gives me more freedom to multitask (a point to consider next time we're on the phone).

Joe Clark is a righteous authority on captioning, and all other issues related to accessibility -- giving the disabled the same access to TV, movies and other entertainment as you or I enjoy. So when he sounds the alarm that closed captioning in the U.S. is about to go to Hell, you pay attention.

Media Access Group at WGBH – which, according to another source, never earned more than 3% to 4% profit margins – simply wasn’t making enough money to satisfy WGBH managers. Now, keep this in mind: The operators of a large nonprofit organization forced the gutting of a nonprofit operation allegedly because it wasn’t earning enough money.

As a result, the biggest and oldest and, in my opinion too, BEST provider of closed captions is effectively kaput.  WGBH also closed its  New York office in the last round of cutbacks driven, it seems, by the increasing age and declining size and wealth of its audience.

Stepping into the void are cut-rate firms, according to Joe. "The recent history of accessible media is one of a race to the bottom," and this won't help things.

Read his full jeremiad here, and then share your own captioning experiences in the comments.

TiVo on your cell phone

Link: AP News.

This is a lot more exciting announcement from TiVo than its deal last week with the Parents Television Council.

Dana's death

Link: Christopher Reeve's Widow Dead at 44.

I learned a long time ago not to associate people's death with the way they lived their lives. Yes, you could say Kirby Puckett was a walking health hazard, the way he ballooned up after quitting baseball. But many, many people, including some TV critics I know, are gargantuan too, and still going.

Yet there is something undeniably sad in Dana Reeve dying, apparently the same way Andy Kaufman did -- as a non-smoker afflicted with a virulent form of lung cancer. Maybe there's something in particular about death in your forties (said the guy about to turn 41).  I know people talk about the tragedy of teenagers cut down in their youth. But a person in his/her forties likely has children (the Reeves leave behind three), and in many ways is just starting to come into their prime. Whatever they've chosen to do with their lives, they've spent a decade or two at it, and have achieved some mastery. Or they've reached a point where they aren't so self-focused (again, the kids play a part) and can turn their gaze outward a little more. (Although not in Puckett's case, as Phil Rogers notes in today's Chicago Tribune.)

At any rate, it's an especially unhappy morning.

And speaking of ways to liven up the Oscars

Susan Sarandon has signed on to guest star in three episodes of FX's critically acclaimed drama series RESCUE ME. The Academy Award winning actress will play "Franco's" (Daniel Sunjata) latest flame, who happens to be a rich successful older woman.  In the role of "Alicia," Sarandon will seduce Franco by teaching him that an older woman is exactly what he needs.  Sarandon will appear starting in the second episode of season three. Currently in production, season three of RESCUE ME will premiere on FX in early summer.

Not nice (but funny)

So it's come to this ... not content to count the errors of New York Times TV critic Alessandra Stanley as she makes them, certain (male) stalkers are now trying to predict how she's going to screw up in the future:

Link: The Pop View.

"Intervention" spinoff

I'm looking forward to this one, too.

CBS reloads

As it has done in previous years, the CBS network issued early and practically perfunctory renewal orders to 14 of its prime time shows.

Update: According to the trades, the network has already cancelled five shows, too: "King of Queens," "Still Standing," and "Yes, Dear" and new shows "Close To Home" and "Out of Practice." Boy, the way they're wrapping up CBS's business, you'd think Les Moonves and company had another network to run.