What's working for me...

1. "The National Parks." You're not watching it this week? Even after I told you it was the best thing Ken Burns has done? You'd probably run over Ranger Rick, too. There's still hope for you -- KCPT is rerunning all 12 hours this weekend.

2. "Modern Family." Huge numbers for ABC's first mockumentary sitcom mean that the pride of Piper, Eric Stonestreet, will have a full season of employment.

3. Cooler heads at "SNL." After Jenny Slate's accidental on-air obscenity, NBC announced her job was safe. (Stations can't be fined by the FCC because indecency rules don't apply to TV after 10 p.m.) Still, Lorne Michaels could put the show on a brief delay -- but he did that with Richard Pryor 34 years ago and caught hell for it. Here's hoping he keeps Saturday nights live.

... AND WHAT'S NOT

1. Royals last home game untelevised. A poor decision by Fox and the team -- especially since Minnesota's Fox Sports crew was there broadcasting the game anyway. Who would you have watched on Sunday: Zack Greinke or the Chiefs?

2. Obama pitching Chicago's Olympic bid. It's not that he's flying off to Denmark with everything happening at home (c'mon people, he has a Blackberry). It's just that I thought he promised not to add to America's budget deficit.

3. "The Beautiful Life," RIP. An ugly death as CW makes this ungainly companion show to "Top Model" the first casualty of the fall season. Now we'll never know if Mischa Barton makes a comeback.