Protect children from violence

It sickens me that in the midst of winter holidays, we are reading about a 3-year-old boy beaten to death, and his mother’s boyfriend has been charged with the crime (12/30, Local, “Charges in boy’s death; Cass County prosecutor says Javier R. Barker caused 3-year-old Dillon Bahorski’s death by hitting, kicking him”).

I am registered nurse and hold a degree in sociology. However, I’m at a loss as to why these horrible crimes continue in America. It’s hard to believe this child’s mother had no clue her boyfriend might be violent or that she had no one else to watch her children. If she had no options, our government is tragically failing the millions of children being raised by single parents.

We spend so much time, money and energy trying to correct “wrongs” in other countries. Maybe it’s time for us to look in our own backyard. We have “Amber” alerts. How about “Dillon” alerts? Maybe we could have saved this little boy.

Deborah McCrady
Warrensburg, Mo.

Comments

[jennifer]

yes i agree that a child needs displine but not to death.

[jennifer]

Thats not only wrong but makes me feel sick. Where does any three-year-old have the right to be beaten that way why would the mother not have any common sense i mean really? can she not see the brusies and marks when the child takes a bath. im not a mom but its not that difficult. that is a sign of not caring and people like that should not be able to have childern. dont leave your son with a "boyfriend" when you are at work that is what fucking daycare is for, i feel horrible for the mom but more for the child, any person in this world who could repeatdly harm a child like that is a fucking scum bag. i pray for the family and the child. :(

[certain]

In most cases, I agree with you that there are typical signs of an abuser/people who are being abused. As a person close with both parties I can say with 100% certainty that Javier never showed any aggression or anger towards her children. Casey was VERY selective with who she let watch her children. Feeling completely confident in her boyfriends ability, and the fact that they loved spending time with him, she let him watch them a couple days a week. This just isnt the typical case your hear on the news over and over... that is why so many people are defending Javier on blogs across the web, because this just wasnt his character. But obviously something horrible happened that night at his hands that nobody saw coming. Its sad and sickening, but I guess there truly are wolves in sheeps clothing among us.

[NoMoreMrNiceGuy]

Child abuse is out of line and anyone that truly abuses a defensless child should be punished with no mercy. At the same time, many kids seem to think THEY set the rules and do not have to comply with any authority. IN schools much of the act is to attract attention, many kids have this grandure pipedream that they are OG, thinking anyone really gives two about their phony antics. Discipline is a must, even in this entitlement thinking world we live in where the children are supposed get whatever they feel they are entitled to or else. I do agree with Sol, a whipping is one thing, a beating is another. One thing we don't need are social workers coaching and scripting kids to lie out of resentment.

[Art Chick]

Thanks, TinaMcG. Apt and powerful comment.

I was the one in our neighborhood. I was raised in the 60's, and no one called the SRS or cops on my mother,no matter what kind of screams came from our house.

That we're more aware now is a good thing, but I know it has never/will never stop. \
Just be vigilant, folks. Sometimes you may be the only lifeline a little child has.

[TinaMcG]

I'm the 5th grade, I sat next to the slowest kid in the class. Our teacher really favored me, loved my mom and dad, made it clear to everyone I was teacher's pet. He loathed Gary, the slow kid. He screamed at him, slapped him upside the head, and did this painful pinch-twist thing on the kid that left bruising.

So there I was, perfectly compliant kid, honor student and all, terrified of that teacher and seething with hate -- at the tender age of ten years. I made damned sure I got straight A's because I was terrified the teacher would turn on me next. I will never forgive him for what he did to Gary -- or to me.

There are so many ways to abuse a child, and it's so heartbreaking to hear of the things adults do to little ones who have no capacity to understand what makes adults do what they do. We forget how many scars are left even after their bodies heal.

I think the baggage we adults carry into our lives has a lot to do with how we were treated as children. We like to think these little emotional murders didn't affect us, but they do.

[solomon]

Sickens me in mid summer too. Hard to pick out which child is being abused. Looking back on childhood, I remember some kids who were probably beaten beyond what then was an appropriate "whipping". Hell, seems like everybody got a whipping for something back then that would have the state services at your door today. You'd end up joking about it at the playground the next day.